Seeing oneself as androgynous

[akiross]

From the time I was born, I've never really thought of myself as being just a girl or just a boy. Although I understand and accept the fact that I am female, I don't believe in playing or acting the part due to the sex you are born with. In many regards, I see myself as being both genders in one. I see myself as very much an androgynous person, and so long as nobody tries to push me out of it, I'm quite happy with it.

Gender itself is mostly a performance. The way we walk. The way we talk. The clothes we wear. The vehicles we drive. The jobs we have. The music we listen to. Language, food, entertainment, the list goes on. Ultimately the idea of femininity or masculinity is simply a cultural concept.

Anyway. I still carry some "feminine" traits, but plenty of so-called "masculine" ones on top of that. I have long hair but I ride a mountain bike. I write poetry and paint but also play drums in a hard rock band. I wear sports gear but I own lace and dresses too, and I wear them occasionally. Personally, I just take whatever I like from either the "girl" or the "boy" categories and I'm not fussed.

The problem I have with society and these gendered traits is when it comes to sexist oppression (believe me, it still exists, and very much so). People telling me I shouldn't go out at night because I'm female, when my male peers are supposedly fine to go out in the dark without question. Society banning females from being bare chested in public, even in the hottest weather, when you see men go around like that all the time. And there are too many other things to list.

Due to this, I sometimes find myself getting depressed from being female in this world. Feminism is an attempt for more equality but it's not strong enough, or at least it isn't making enough of an impact. Besides, for some reason a lot of people don't like feminists, and it saddens me that a lot of people condemn those who believe in sex equality. The other issue I even have with the term "feminism" is the fact that it has the word "feminine" in it, when a lot feminists actually try to transcend the notion of being "feminine" itself. And might I add that it would be better to call oneself a "gender equalist" as opposed to a "feminist", because a gender-equalist acknowledges the inequalities faced by males, not only females (and believe me, they do exist too).

Does anybody else share these thoughts? Do you see yourself as androgynous, like I do?

[monroe]

Ohh, let's do this.

Androgyny is maybe too strong a word for it, but some of my habits could be perceived as masculine, and others feminine. If masculinity and femininity were lines of best fit, the deviations would be our defining traits.

I love roughing it in the outdoors/I enjoy going to malls and shopping

Nothing else comes to mind at the moment, but I'll probably think of more at work.

I believe gender equality to be impossible because the sexes are not equal. That doesn't mean we shouldn't treat each other fairly, but we definitely have basic roles assigned to us by nature. Just look at animals, they aren't aware of these issues, yet the females tend to rear the young while males hunt/mooch/sex. Except maybe seahorses.

[Pushnpull]

Sept 26, 2010 6:05:17 GMT -5 @akiross said:

From the time I was born, I've never really thought of myself as being just a girl or just a boy. Although I understand and accept the fact that I am female, I don't believe in playing or acting the part due to the sex you are born with. In many regards, I see myself as being both genders in one. I see myself as very much an androgynous person, and so long as nobody tries to push me out of it, I'm quite happy with it.

Gender itself is mostly a performance. The way we walk. The way we talk. The clothes we wear. The vehicles we drive. The jobs we have. The music we listen to. Language, food, entertainment, the list goes on. Ultimately the idea of femininity or masculinity is simply a cultural concept.

Anyway. I still carry some "feminine" traits, but plenty of so-called "masculine" ones on top of that. I have long hair but I ride a mountain bike. I write poetry and paint but also play drums in a hard rock band. I wear sports gear but I own lace and dresses too, and I wear them occasionally. Personally, I just take whatever I like from either the "girl" or the "boy" categories and I'm not fussed.

The problem I have with society and these gendered traits is when it comes to sexist oppression (believe me, it still exists, and very much so). People telling me I shouldn't go out at night because I'm female, when my male peers are supposedly fine to go out in the dark without question. Society banning females from being bare chested in public, even in the hottest weather, when you see men go around like that all the time. And there are too many other things to list.

Due to this, I sometimes find myself getting depressed from being female in this world. Feminism is an attempt for more equality but it's not strong enough, or at least it isn't making enough of an impact. Besides, for some reason a lot of people don't like feminists, and it saddens me that a lot of people condemn those who believe in sex equality. The other issue I even have with the term "feminism" is the fact that it has the word "feminine" in it, when a lot feminists actually try to transcend the notion of being "feminine" itself. And might I add that it would be better to call oneself a "gender equalist" as opposed to a "feminist", because a gender-equalist acknowledges the inequalities faced by males, not only females (and believe me, they do exist too).

Does anybody else share these thoughts? Do you see yourself as androgynous, like I do?

Is mountain biking really a masculine trait ?I use my mountain bike to commute 9.5 miles(per mapquest) each way to work. (unfortunately mountain bike ain't the best bike to commute but I am cheap and can't afford a new one) . But I don't see it as an adrogynous trait though.

Going to the gym I am actually around females that are a bit adrogynous. Some seem to play it up though. Trying too hard to not look like the sex they were born. There is one who appears to try way too hard to be a "tomboy".

She still can't do a pushup to save her life though.

I remember asking her if I could work in with her on the pullup machine. She was doing it the "assisted way", with her knees on the support bench provided.

She rolled her eyes at me when I asked if I could work in. Probaby eyeing my super feminine brazil shorts, my painted nails and my long hair and thinking I was just another girl at the gym trying to look cute.

True.

I do like looking cute. I could keep lying to myself and say I work out for my health. Partly. the main reason - I want to look cute.

So she rolls her eyes and says , "sure" gets off the machine and then walks away in a manner I can only describe as a girl trying way too hard to walk like a boy.

So I get on the machine. Flip the bench rest up because I ain't using the machine assisted and do my 10 pullups and then drop to the floor and for good measure while she is still looking at me, do 10 one arm pushups on each arm and tell her that the machine is now all hers.

God...I wish I could have videotaped her expression.

Are one-arm pushups an adrogynous trait?

Heck.. most men can't do them either.

[meep]

Apples cannot be Oranges. So "equality" in all aspects of the word cannot be attained. Equity is more realisable thing, I believe.

The fact that you complain and disagree that things in life are/should be gendered but also acknowledge the gendered attributes of your person is somewhat ironic. Genders are inherently different, to deny this is not going to achieve anything. What we need is respect between the two sexes.

[dannyd]

Well put Robyn.

[admin]

It mystifies and disappoints me when we get a new member who asks a thought-provoking question and gets heartfelt and topical responses...and then deletes their account without comment.

Kudos to EANers for answering - I'd hoped for a dialogue.

[TeeHee]

Sept 26, 2010 7:48:12 GMT -5 Pushnpull said:

There is one who appears to try way too hard to be a "tomboy".

She still can't do a pushup to save her life though.

I remember asking her if I could work in with her on the pullup machine. She was doing it the "assisted way", with her knees on the support bench provided.

She rolled her eyes at me when I asked if I could work in. Probaby eyeing my super feminine brazil shorts, my painted nails and my long hair and thinking I was just another girl at the gym trying to look cute.

True.

I do like looking cute. I could keep lying to myself and say I work out for my health. Partly. the main reason - I want to look cute.

So she rolls her eyes and says , "sure" gets off the machine and then walks away in a manner I can only describe as a girl trying way too hard to walk like a boy.

So I get on the machine. Flip the bench rest up because I ain't using the machine assisted and do my 10 pullups and then drop to the floor and for good measure while she is still looking at me, do 10 one arm pushups on each arm and tell her that the machine is now all hers.

God...I wish I could have videotaped her expression.

I wish you could've captured that too, that's just priceless!
I love hearing your stories of fitness...knowing your background, where you've been and where you are now(fitness-wise of course), it's quite inspiring for someone like myself who's just getting back on the wagon.

[penguinopolipitese]

sometimes I'll wonder... should I wear this because it's such and such a colour and is that masculine or should I do this or that activity because it's associated with being for this sex or that. In the end I usually just do it anyway. I know exactly who I am and do what I want to do. Although sometimes I do feel self-conscious or sheepish.

[helloagain]

I think traditional gender roles are bunk. It's a big world, do what you want and be proud of who you are. So you aren't like most of the girls, frankly, I think that's a good thing, love. Being a woman is awesome, you just have to tilt the picture a bit, look from a different angle.

[Tay tay]

I don't see myself as androgynous, however I am sick to death of what people now view as specific to a particular gender. For example, I'm male right, so why do I get teased for liking the colour pink, it's A COLOUR FOR GODS SAKE! And why can't I try and look kawaii; just cause I actually care about my appearance. And why do they tease me for wearing makeup, I'm a ruddy actor I WAS SUPPOSED TO WEAR MAKEUP, and I say this with conviction I bloody enjoyed it. It made my eyes POP on stage! Anyway...
( T_T)＼(^-^ )