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Post by jenbrook on May 23, 2009 8:50:40 GMT -5
^Whoops, sorry you know what i mean. Well i suppose you're carrying on the tradition of breaking traditions then arent you
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Post by Subuatai on May 23, 2009 8:54:58 GMT -5
Pretty much heh I can also say; "the sedentary world likes to build walls, us nomads like to break them down." Hehe, but with any revolutionary idea, there is always resistance...
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Post by Paddy on May 28, 2009 18:01:10 GMT -5
People tell me how lucky I am cos my girlfriend hates shopping and spending money. Yeah, it's not a bad thing, but this girl is extreme.
It's not so bad now, but I used to get a mouthful if I bought her something that she considered expensive (which would be in the region of US$10-15). Getting a bollocking would defeat the purpose of buying her a gift! She would gladly pay a lot to get me something though. It was almost as though she felt she wasn't worth it.
Moving on...I think many guys (Asians?) get off on an ego trip when then they can provide all the material goodies a girl can dream of. I know guys who want just that. 'Come and get me - I'm rich!' Sure, some men use their cash to get into a girl's pants, but some just feel that it's their male duty to provide. If I had the means to act as a mobile ATM then I'd be happy with that as long as my wife spent sensibly, and the money didn't compensate for aspects that were missing from our relationship. Obviously 'sensible' spending is a debatable notion. Let's not get into that!
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Post by milkman's baby on May 28, 2009 20:09:04 GMT -5
Moving on...I think many guys (Asians?) get off on an ego trip when then they can provide all the material goodies a girl can dream of. No it's not just an Asian thing, men are like this everywhere in every culture. Makes me wanna barf, really. I'm personally kinda embarrassed by the thought of someone other than my parents footing the bill for anything, especially food. I've always seen giving money as a parental role, so it's just weird to think that a SO would do that. But hey, if some women are into that, that's cool. lol
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Post by ahliang on May 28, 2009 21:11:14 GMT -5
i can understand that you see it as a parental role but how is it any more embarassing to have your SO pay for your food if you d let your parents do it? in neither cases, you re the one paying so i don t know where the embarassement stems... food especially, don t most girls expect that a guy pays for dinner when he takes her out? if anything i would say it s less "embarassing" to have your SO pay for some of your food than have him pay for things other than food...
i don t really see how some women are "into that"...it s not like if a woman accepts to have her SO foot in a bill she s into him for money only... isn t a SO part of the family too? not to mention: not everyone sees the role of parents as cows to milk...in fact after a certain age, i would say the child is the one to take care of their parents so i actually stand on the other end of the spectrum for that...
i would understand a girl have her SO help her if she can t manage by herself, and then her helping out the parents but would have a harder time imagining her expecting her parents to pay for her bills but then casually dating guys on the side and have her parents pay for her dates (if she won t let the guy buy her food, then i would assume she d pay her share, which according to your logic, the parents would pay...)
i know my view on this may be a bit outdated but i think a daughter is the one who should be supporting her parents, maybe with the help of her husband, not the other way around...i d be far more embarassed to pay for my food (like say, on a date with a guy) with money i got from my parents than if the guy/SO was to pay for the food.
i m curious...how do you do on dates? 50/50?
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Post by Subuatai on May 29, 2009 6:49:28 GMT -5
During the course of my relationship with my wife (before marriage), she has always insisted on paying for herself, whenever we go out to eat or to shop or just cruising, she never accepts "bribes". I never liked the idea of being a walking ATM either , and she never liked the idea of being manipulated so easily. So it turned out quite well.
However... ironically this is something that's troubling us at the moment, as she has realised that she is growing very dependent on me ever since she got pregnant. Both of us had always been face to face with a mental wall which we never broke through; we are both independent spirits... refusing to be dependent or be dependent upon. However, I guess with our daughter on the way, things changed.
It's funny how my marriage is encountering this problem, yet I've seen many relationships with men as walking ATM machines and women as cash munchers.
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