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Post by milkman's baby on May 28, 2009 15:28:08 GMT -5
But I think all newborn babies are ugly. Not that I want to be racial, but I was thinking that many white newborns look weird .......always reminded me on Martians. Just because they are sooo white - with almost transparent skin and are bald. But all Asian and black babies which I've seen in the hospital looked cute  Yeah, black babies are cute because they don't turn red and get all wrinkly. I saw this poem on a couple sites and had to chuckle: When I was born...I was BLACK.
When I grew up...I was BLACK.
When I am sick...I am BLACK
When I go out in the sun...I am BLACK.
When I go out in the cold...I am BLACK.
When I die...I am BLACK.
BUT YOU WHITE FOLK :
When you are born...You are PINK.
When you grow up...You are PEACH.
When you are sick...You are GREEN.
When you go out in the cold...You are BLUE.
When you are scared... You are WHITE.
When you go out in the sun...You are RED.
When you die...You turn PURPLE.
And you have the nerve to call me "COLORED"? |
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Post by ahliang on May 28, 2009 21:58:57 GMT -5
^I wouldn't be too harsh on yourself, because what you've just described is the aspect that I would say is the most difficult with regards to parenting. aaah...i think so too...have enough authority for them to respect and look up to you, yet still be a friend to them... by scolding...it really depends...i don t know if i could scold them in a manner that s not "brutal" enough to make sure it has its impact (i MUST know the scolding has its effect otherwise if i m wasting my time, how could i scold them when it really breaks my heart to do so? i would neither have the heart to scold them again nor could i stand being disappointed again...) or if i can even bring myself to scold them so disappointed i would be... it seems that i have a hard time imposing my authority being friendly. i can t be the nice cop...either i m the friend or the cop when the situation calls for it... i have the hardest time sitting a kid down and scolding them the western way, telling them why what they did is bad, and going through it in a calm manner so that they still see you as a friend...but when i scold kids, or at least the few times i have (since my scolding/angered yelling doesn t match the way it s done here i haven t resorted to it anymore so i really find myself helpless trying to impose authority now), i was the "mean cop"...my yelling wasn t solely due to what some would call "selfish irritability" but more so due to the fact that if my disappointment in this kid won t impact him/her for him/her to seek redemption/try to make up for the mistake, how could me sitting them down and softly "scolding" them impact them? not that i would use scolding for catharsis, although i might unconsciously on some level if the mistake angers me so, but i must know that the pain/effort i put into scolding them be effective because it s not anything i enjoy doing so i would hate to have to go through it again (sitting down, being disappointed yet again, and having to "scold" them). aside from irritability leading me to scolding, i wouldn t know how to impose my authority without yelling. and i very much think that s why kids need both parents...i know someone who works at the ymca and although he s friends with all the kids, kids will respect him more than they would respect me...not that i know these kids but from the kids i ve been with, given that i can t yell and act like the crazy asian mum, i have barely any authority with them...he does though...sits kids down, give that dreadfull fatherly look and even if some kids may act unimpressed, i know that a lot of them are...i don t have the fatherly "aura" to do that, and when i sit kids down and try to have a serious talk with them i ll often have them roll their eyes at me (it s happened quite a lot...he doesn t get that though)...because that s not how they see me when they see me as a friend... so i know that in order to leave an impression, i mustn t act like a serious friend but be the real scary cop...and balancing the friend and cop act is the hardest thing for me...then again it also depends on the kid...i know some kids will feel horrible if their friend and authority figure was disappointted in them so they would not do the mistake again...but when they re not, as is the case with kids from a caucasian and upper-middle/upper class background usually...i can t seem to impose my authority without being the mean cop/"lunatic asian mum" as they would call me once i m their friend again...  as you can see, i have that much authority. |
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as you can see, i have that much authority.