The Gene Machine

[palaver]

If you've ever been to Dave and Busters, then you might have come across this aptly named Fotomorph photo booth. A couple goes in to have their pictures taken and out spits an image of their potential offspring. It takes some of the guess work out of family planning in case you're going for an exotic, never-before-heard-of mix.

Side story:

My friends and I were up in Cinci at the local D&B when we saw this machine. The couples in the group paired up to have their pictures taken leaving me and my friend, the only bachelors group on the sidelines. My Nicaraguan friend unsuccessfully tried to solicit female passersby to have simulated children with him in the photo booth--which is not as bad as it sounds. After all, it's just a photo. So I said why not and volunteered to have my Gene Machine Fotomorph taken with him. When people around the booth saw the image come up on the screen, they were surprised. Our daughter was quite beautiful.

We then had a humorous argument over who our daughter got their good looks from--a conversation you don't want to have with another man while sober. I played the Asian card saying that the machine obviously picked up on my more feminine Asian features. He played the Latin card saying that Nicaraguan men might not be natural cross dressers (an insult to me), but their women are naturally beautiful and that dimorphism should explain why our daughter came out so beautiful. I shot back that he never told the Gene Machine that he was Nicaraguan so it probably mistook him for a Mexican. That was sore spot for him, but we had a good laugh anyway...

These guys had the same idea... though with different results.

[mingzayni88]

LMFAO @ the results!

[maow]

Jesus! lol

[milkman's baby]

I already know my children will be ugly regardless of what the father looks like.

[palaver]

Sept 11, 2009 16:27:22 GMT -5 milkman's baby said:

I already know my children will be ugly regardless of what the father looks like.

Don't say that. There's the possibility of being switched at birth. ;D

I kid. I kid. You should be more concerned over the things you have some control over. I'm more frightened about trying to raise tolerant ethical human beings in this day and age. But if what they say is true... about the good dying young, I'll probably outlive my children and take out some life insurance.

So cheer up. I'll probably make a few extra kids so your kid won't be lonely. I'm probably not helping...

[milkman's baby]

Sept 13, 2009 0:14:18 GMT -5 @palaver said:

Sept 11, 2009 16:27:22 GMT -5 milkman's baby said:

I already know my children will be ugly regardless of what the father looks like.

Don't say that. There's the possibility of being switched at birth. ;D

I kid. I kid. You should be more concerned over the things you have some control over. I'm more frightened about trying to raise tolerant ethical human beings in this day and age. But if what they say is true... about the good dying young, I'll probably outlive my children and take out some life insurance.

So cheer up. I'll probably make a few extra kids so your kid won't be lonely. I'm probably not helping...

Sounds good to me. If you do somehow end up having an ugly kid and you'd like to draft some sort of deal for an arranged marriage with my kid, let me know. Out here in Nebraska we gots plenty of land and cattle to make for a good dowry.

[palaver]

Sept 13, 2009 14:17:20 GMT -5 milkman's baby said:

Sounds good to me. If you do somehow end up having an ugly kid and you'd like to draft some sort of deal for an arranged marriage with my kid, let me know. Out here in Nebraska we gots plenty of land and cattle to make for a good dowry.

How about a kid with low self esteem? Guaranteed to never leave a bad relationship.