monroe
Junior Member
Fastidious Grunge Lover - a study in contrasts
Posts: 152
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Post by monroe on Apr 18, 2010 22:23:20 GMT -5
The thread for anyone who's had experience with them.
Just recently, I managed to detect and evade one of these. The whole ordeal was kind of s***ty, though.
Two months back there was a girl I often talked to during my mid-day break. Well, two girls, but that doesn't really matter. Well, a week or two pass and gradually the things we talk about get more in-depth. The first red flag appears throughout these times as I start getting stopped by random people who seem to know an awful lot about our conversations. Second red flag is when girl x starts saying bad things about the other girl and others in general. This goes on until one weekend I get a text from the girl in question asking to meet up (third red flag, considering I didn't give her my phone number), but against my better judgement we hooked up, sex, blah blah blah. The next day, it seems like every other person I run into knows about this, so I decide it's probably in my best interest to stay the hell away.
I give it my best shot, but it seems no matter where I go, I can't shake this girl. Friends start telling me girl x is going around asking about me. That, and I'm being barraged by calls. One morning, I wake up and head to breakfast, when I see from about 200 yards away girl x waiting by the door of the place I like to eat. She sees me, gets visibly excited, and runs in to go wait by one of my favorite tables. I talk to her for one more meal before activating evasive maneuvers. Change my number, start hanging around at completely different places, etc. A couple weeks of this and I'm finally free, so free.
I'm willing to bet females are more likely to be stalked, but that doesn't make it suck any less. It was starting to affect me on a personal level (couldn't eat, exercise or even rest without stalker being there).
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palavore
Full Member
I put my pants on just like the rest of you -- one leg at a time. Except, once my pants are on, I make gold posts.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Posts: 298
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Post by palavore on Apr 19, 2010 0:13:45 GMT -5
^ You boned a chick then gave her the cold shoulder.
That could cause some serious self esteem issues if you don't tell her exactly why you're avoiding all contact. You think she's a nutter now? Don't go burying mines for other guys to step on...
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Post by One Eye on Apr 19, 2010 2:33:39 GMT -5
She was stalking you but didn't know where you lived? Not saying she wasn't a real stalker...but maybe she was just a lazy one. I've had a couple stalkers and it was nowhere near as easy as that to stop them. One I moved to a different state and he was still able to get into contact with me months after, I have no idea how. Horrible nasty texts that make you want to crawl into a hole and die. My last relationship the guy was a bit possessive and controlling and stalkerish if not an actual stalker and even though he has no idea where I live or what my number is now, I'm still looking over my shoulder.
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monroe
Junior Member
Fastidious Grunge Lover - a study in contrasts
Posts: 152
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Post by monroe on Apr 19, 2010 10:03:43 GMT -5
I don't usually give females the cold shoulder afterwards. Actually, I usually try to avoid sex because it very often makes things awkward. This particular one was insistent and pretty much forced herself on me. Then I find out she has a reputation for doing this, so joke's on me. In hindsight, I probably should have declined but as I said before, it was against my better judgement.
Not denying that I have commitment problem. I've left behind at least a couple pretty good people-beautiful girls that I can relate to on a personal level-often times for reasons I don't really understand myself. I could write books on the intimate details, but instead I carry the memories around with me. This particular incident, wasn't one of those.
She does actually know where I live, though the place has strict access control. Never been happier for that. I know where you're coming from, One Eye. Growing up, my parents taught me never to get so hung up over somebody that I get in serious trouble. So it's pretty surprising seeing it happen all around.
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Post by Ganbare! on Apr 19, 2010 10:33:33 GMT -5
Don't go burying mines for other guys to step on... Word. I'm a little unsure so I'll spell it out first: does our advice count if we've got some experience as former stalkers ourselves? ;D On a more serious note, I don't understand what troubles you so much, it's not like she going to poison your drink or put a roofie in it. File a police report or threaten, it's not like you were a defenseless female with an 250-pound stalker on your hands.
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Post by admin on Apr 19, 2010 13:49:40 GMT -5
I dunno, seems fair to me. You sexed her up and ran, I think she gets to stalk you a little. Man up and bear it!
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palavore
Full Member
I put my pants on just like the rest of you -- one leg at a time. Except, once my pants are on, I make gold posts.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Posts: 298
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Post by palavore on Apr 19, 2010 18:05:22 GMT -5
^ Lol. You can't say that without giving him some survival training. This young man needs practical advice: Monroe, when you head back home use these evasive maneuvers--since she doesn't know where you live yet. Remember to doubleback every once and a while. Climb up large trees and when crossing rivers, wade upstream. That'll throw her off your scent. Why upstream? She probably thinks you're lazy, so she'll be looking downstream. This particular one was insistent and pretty much forced herself on me. Then I find out she has a reputation for doing this, so joke's on me. You make a good case for yourself. But not all women are jokers (in both sense of the word). Next time you might be forced to take responsibility.
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monroe
Junior Member
Fastidious Grunge Lover - a study in contrasts
Posts: 152
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Post by monroe on Apr 19, 2010 19:53:30 GMT -5
This was past-tense y'all (as in two months ago). Evasive maneuvers succeeded within a week of application.
To be honest, the whole ordeal wasn't particularly bothersome. I think I was just butthurt earlier today because I had to work during the weekend; got 3 hours sleep; and had to wake up at 0500 To do a PT eval. If anything, a lot more funny stuff came out of this than negative.
I'm sure there's a lesson in there somewhere, too. Not really sure what it is and I most likely wouldn't apply it if I did.
On an unrelated note, I'm a pretty strong PT'er (and that includes swimming). Finished the eval today first in strength, second in endurance.
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Post by admin on Apr 19, 2010 20:54:51 GMT -5
On an unrelated note, I'm a pretty strong PT'er (and that includes swimming). Finished the eval today first in strength, second in endurance. Awesome!
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Post by FreckleFoot on May 6, 2010 15:39:25 GMT -5
I've had stalkers. Three come to mind. One in school, one in university and one very recently.
The first one was a friend of a friend. He was quite friendly and always seemed to want to sit with me and talk with me, but would tell me the most awkward and disgusting things that I didn't want to know. Suddenly he was catching the same bus back home with me (he usually took another) and was watching for the stop I got off. One day he came into school and described my house to me in great detail. He said he was only passing by on the way to school, but to go to my house from the road he lived on was a big detour and 'passing by' wouldn't leave you recalling every item that stood on the window sills.
The second stalker was in university. He appeared to be mentally disturbed, but I did not know until I had approached him and gone to several lectures/seminars with him. I felt sorry for him because no one had been talking to him. I soon found out why. His bizarre behaviour was not only unsettling, but also frightening. One time he was rubbing his crotch while sitting next to me and later began trying everything to get me to go places alone with him, finding out where all my lectures/seminars were when we did not share one and rushing to catch me before I left.
The last one was in Brazil. I had already had a number of problems with some of the men there, but this one was the most disturbing. First I thought he was just like all the others. He was cycling along the promenade and when he saw me he started making kissing noises and staring back at me. I kept walking. He appeared behind me a second time and went by staring. Further up he appeared a third time with a man on foot and stared at me grinning. I smiled back a bit uncomfortably to be polite and carried on walking without looking back. I sat down on a bench far ahead to wait for my husband, removed my jacket so if the man followed me he might not recognise me again. He came cycling up and stopped in a way that the bike was curved around me and the bench, so it was difficult for me to get away. He started asking all sorts of questions, then saying that I was his girlfriend now and constantly calling me beautiful. I said in Portuguese I was married, that I had a husband, but he kept repeating himself until I had said it many times. Then he nodded, said, 'Ahhh... Okay, okay. Excuse me, excuse me,' and left.
A few days later I walked several kilometres to see one of the natural attractions in the area. After a long time walking I finally reached the last road to cross. I was watching the cars when suddenly I heard a man shouting, 'Oi! Oi!' (Hi!/Hello!) After all the trouble I had had with men I hoped it was for someone else and ignored it, but he called out again and I couldn't avoid turning around. It was the same guy on his bike! He had followed me all the way! I could not run away because he was on a bike. He started again with calling me beautiful and saying I was his girlfriend. Telling me he loved me over and over again, looking at me as if I was his soul mate. Constantly asking for me to give him 'one kiss'. He grabbed my hand and tried to kiss me, gripping me tighter when I pulled away. I didn't know if it was safe to react physically. There weren't many people on foot. What if he reacted violently too? He was larger and stronger than me. He began harassing me to go far away alone with him, saying he would pay for everything. Asking for my e-mail, phone number, address, etc. Telling me to meet him here tomorrow. I gave him false contact information and he finally left after getting kisses on the cheeks (as is the custom between 'friends'). He also seemed crazy to be telling me he loved me when he didn't even know me: I didn't want to suddenly act as if we weren't friends after I played the part so well in order to make him leave me be as soon as possible. After all, I am used to kissing stranger's cheeks and I would much rather do that than have his tongue down my throat!
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palavore
Full Member
I put my pants on just like the rest of you -- one leg at a time. Except, once my pants are on, I make gold posts.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Posts: 298
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Post by palavore on May 7, 2010 19:41:54 GMT -5
^That started to read like a novel.
I'm writing a book right now: Confessions of a Lady Killer: How I Picked Up Women Delivering Noodles
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monroe
Junior Member
Fastidious Grunge Lover - a study in contrasts
Posts: 152
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Post by monroe on May 10, 2010 0:08:34 GMT -5
That third guy sounded a bit dangerous, Frecklefoot-assault and sexual harassment-hopefully you don't run into him again.
Was just showering when I realized what really triggered my above episode. As the night was winding down, she addressed me by my name... you know, instead of my rank. If the lights were on, I would have visibly cringed and done a double-take.
Guy and a girl get partnered up for pig dissection week in biology class. Guy realizes he's really into this girl and begins a crusade to find out all about her. Later that week part of the pig goes missing only to reappear in girl's locker as a bundle of optic nerves tacked to a note entitled "eye stalk you." Ba-dum-chh
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conorsoccr23
Junior Member
EAN Spelling Bee Winner!
Posts: 158
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Post by conorsoccr23 on May 12, 2010 16:19:47 GMT -5
omg once wen i was in iowa at my chink gparents house some creppy old dude came up to me and idk started talkin to me and of coarse he asked "whats your ethnicity" so i sed oh im puerto rican(im chinese and irish) and asian he was lik "i can tell your puerto rican but i had no idea u were asian and thn he was askin about my dad if he was strong (prob to see what happened if he raped me dont worry it was by a busy street)
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Post by Ganbare! on May 12, 2010 16:46:24 GMT -5
When we were little, my sister was stalked by a man, it freaked us out but it was the 90's parents were still letting their kids walk to school alone. I doubt many parents let their children by themselves on the streets nowadays but I guess some irresponsible ones still do.
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