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Post by Ganbare! on Dec 15, 2009 17:33:00 GMT -5
I was told I act in a feminine way because of interests traditionally attributed to girls.
Do you think dichotomic gender roles are still relevant in today's world ? Should particular activities or postures be exclusive ?
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Post by milkman's baby on Dec 15, 2009 21:24:01 GMT -5
Great thread, Ganbarel. I actually have thought at times from reading your posts that you are rather feminine in personality. You seem to emote like a woman, and I can see a lot of colorful passion in your writing. No complaints.
On the flip side of that, I've been told and I truly believe myself that I am kinda masculine in personality and some of my actions. I'm unclean, very stoic (actually passed on from my father, though), and insensitive. I don't get offended easily, either. In my experience, these traits of mine have been received negatively by the majority of people I come across, both male and female. I'm not trying to pull the men-have-it-so-much-better card here, but I honestly have to say if I were a male, I probably wouldn't have as hard a time socially as I do now. This doesn't necessarily make me angry, I've learned to accept gender roles as is. You know the old scenario: a man who yells at his employees is firm and orderly. A woman who yells at her employees is a slimy bitch. lol People subconsciously expect men to possess those traits I listed above. They don't expect it of women, so when they do come across one like me they are disgusted, repulsed, and thrown off. Now, the thing is, I'm not very masculine in appearance and I do still have some feminine interests (fashion to an extent, I wear pink every now and then, I hate sports, etc.). I think this is what makes it even worse for some people because they are thrown off by such a "manly personality" on a 5'2" tall half Asian girl with pearl earrings.
So all that would make you wonder how feminine men are perceived. First, one has to separate the feminine males who are homosexuals from the heterosexuals, because knowing a man's sexual preference changes people's perceptions of him as well. I have known some heterosexual males who seems to constitute the traditional male look and actions in every way except that he was very expressive emotionally. Perhaps it's obvious that I notice other males don't like these men but women take a liking to them. However, it does not work inversely the same for me, as even "manly men" don't like my personality.
It's all a tangle of personal experiences and I'm sure some people will report otherwise but it's interesting to think of nonetheless. We often don't think about how gender changes our perceptions and interactions with others.
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hypeforlife91
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Crazy for Dots.
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Post by hypeforlife91 on Dec 15, 2009 23:28:41 GMT -5
^ From knowing you on these forums for quite a while, the first thing I think of you is that you are a genuine person. You're the type that isn't afraid to speak your mind. I admire you so much for it because I am the type that usually holds back on certain things. I also feel that you are very intelligent. You know so much about everything and seem to have experienced so much in life. This is also something else I wish I had. You're just a very funny and smart person that I look up to.  |
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palavore
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I put my pants on just like the rest of you -- one leg at a time. Except, once my pants are on, I make gold posts.
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Post by palavore on Dec 16, 2009 1:42:26 GMT -5
I was told I act in a feminine way because of interests traditionally attributed to girls. Are you right brained? Sisters and no brothers? (Spinning clockwise or counter-clockwise?) [url=http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/wacky/the-right-brain-vs-left-brain/story-e6frev20-1111114577583 ]  [/url] |
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Post by D.A on Dec 16, 2009 6:26:07 GMT -5
I've never been able to see her go counter-clockwise... but with the lists that accompany this, I'd most definitely attribute myself more to the left brain than the right.... wtf?
In regards to your question.
Gender roles are just another stereotype that human's use to quickly categorise their judgments or perceptions of others. I'd be disappointed if there was a necessity to have gender roles in today's developed world, further, I would like to see anthropogenic gender roles within the developing world become less apparent over time, whereby eventually they will be able to define through reason the societal benefits of equal opportunity regardless of gender.
There are some common traits and roles that are attributed towards particular genders, most likely due to their physical (chemical and/or genetical) makeup (note: I'm not entirely discounting environmental influences or behaviour either), but this does not exclude the other gender from naturally playing that role, nor should it be judged or perceive as wrong or only relevant to the gender in which the role is more common with.
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Post by Ganbare! on Dec 16, 2009 6:50:10 GMT -5
I don't believe in those pseudo scientific tests, apparently I have a left brain although I'm quite rational.. I credit my feminine nature to growing up without a father or a firm male role model, living in female-only household caused me to internalize male-female equality and to sport certain feminine traits... I'm not gay, I don't wear purses nor do I have female mannerism either.  Genders roles are increasingly blurred in the West, metrosexual cross-dressing, female legal and socioeconomic empowerment.. However, I think the larger trend we are witnessing is the emasculinization of men. |
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Post by D.A on Dec 16, 2009 6:55:17 GMT -5
but the true question is, do you dance like carlton?
<-
;D
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Post by Ganbare! on Dec 16, 2009 7:18:05 GMT -5
Loved the episode where his dad told kiddy Carlton he would be the US first Black president to which he replies with a squeaky horrified voice"I'M BLACK?". Upper class private environment white washing..
PS: it's Ganbare(!) not Ganbarel
Back on topic:
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palavore
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I put my pants on just like the rest of you -- one leg at a time. Except, once my pants are on, I make gold posts.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
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Post by palavore on Dec 16, 2009 10:45:04 GMT -5
I don't believe in those pseudo scientific tests, apparently I have a left brain although I'm quite rational.. What did you mean by although? Does being left brain contradict being rational? Since you're into the hard stuff (science that is), what operational definition of feminine acts are you using? (BTW, a question isn't pseudo scientific in itself. Though, the lateralization of brain functions doesn't quite fall in that category either since it can be demonstrated.) From my experience, (straight) men who have more female friends than male friends tend a) possess the dominant personality of 40% of female population or b) possess an open talky personality with slight hints of neuroticism and histrionic behavior (drama kings). |
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Post by milkman's baby on Dec 16, 2009 11:27:51 GMT -5
I don't know if I'd call it a stereotype as much as I'd call it a protocol. It's a set of rules and positions that people believe one is destined to fill in society. --------------------------------------------------------- Sorry. ^ From knowing you on these forums for quite a while, the first thing I think of you is that you are a genuine person. You're the type that isn't afraid to speak your mind. I admire you so much for it because I am the type that usually holds back on certain things. I also feel that you are very intelligent. You know so much about everything and seem to have experienced so much in life. This is also something else I wish I had. You're just a very funny and smart person that I look up to. Aw shucks, hype. Thanks. Never been told that before, so I am truly flattered. And don't kid yourself, you are very intelligent. I really do enjoy reading your posts.  |
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Post by milkman's baby on Dec 16, 2009 11:31:06 GMT -5
From my experience, (straight) men who have more female friends than male friends tend a) possess the dominant personality of 40% of female population or b) possess an open talky personality with slight hints of neuroticism and histrionic behavior (drama kings). This is obvious to most people. What would draw a female to a platonic friendship with a straight male if he didn't possess feminine characteristics? Well the exception would be a manly woman, I guess. But like I pointed out, it does not work inversely for me as a dudely woman (hehe). Women tend to be more open and receptive to platonic friendships with males than males are with females. I think I would have to be an absolutely butch lesbian drag king to be accepted as one of the boys. |
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Post by Ganbare! on Dec 16, 2009 13:17:37 GMT -5
I don't believe in those pseudo scientific tests, apparently I have a left brain although I'm quite rational.. What did you mean by although? Does being left brain contradict being rational? Since you're into the hard stuff (science that is), what operational definition of feminine acts are you using? (BTW, a question isn't pseudo scientific in itself. Though, the lateralization of brain functions doesn't quite fall in that category either since it can be demonstrated.) From my experience, (straight) men who have more female friends than male friends tend a) possess the dominant personality of 40% of female population or b) possess an open talky personality with slight hints of neuroticism and histrionic behavior (drama kings). Sorry for that I'm typing from a stolen wifi that keeps disconnecting, you virtually have to pay for everything here (today my supervisor joked that the City Hall plans to tax the farting "pollution"), I meant to write a comma. Anyways, the emasculinization of men is a growing trend because virility is more and more associated with violence which is considered an undesirable trait in a pacified, knowledge-driven society, monoparentality is responsible as well. What I consider feminine behaviours are : openness, communication or negociation |
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palavore
Full Member
I put my pants on just like the rest of you -- one leg at a time. Except, once my pants are on, I make gold posts.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
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Post by palavore on Dec 16, 2009 15:24:23 GMT -5
What I consider feminine behaviours are : openness, communication or negociation I found this from a while back. You can thank me after you've taken the tests and read the articles:  -angles -spot the difference -hands -emotions and systems -eyes -fingers -faces -3d shapes -words -ultimatum  ______________________^ (I'm right here) |
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Post by catgirl on Dec 19, 2009 17:46:25 GMT -5
I felt feminine when I went to nursing school, but now I feel kind of more masculine for studying medicine. Like having an education higher than most males in the end... Not so attractive maybe?  |
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Post by bulaklak on Feb 3, 2010 23:07:36 GMT -5
^ Funny, here in the US most med and vet students are women. (I dunno why, maybe women are better at taking tests and memorizing information and thus have high MCAT/GPA scores?) I'm studying at an engineering college. Now that field is male dominated. The school population is about 30% female which is pretty good but the number of female staff/professors is still low. Girls just aren't encouraged enough to pursue interests in science and mathematics but in the next 10-20 years it will probably even out.
What about gender roles in the family? More women are working these days but they are still expected to take care of things at home on top of their career. I know one couple where the dad stayed home and watched the kids, cooked etc. (he had a programming job) and the mom worked outside the home. I don't think this is the norm though.
In my family, both my parents work full time and make comparable salaries. They share household duties. My dad does most of the cooking (thank God) and my mom won't let him near the washing machine and cleaning supplies (shes a little OCD + germaphobe). Even though gender roles are not so defined in my family, my parents definitely treated my brother differently than me and my sisters. Like if I wanted to go to a boy's house, I had to bring my little brother along as a chaperone. But he was allowed to go out whenever he wanted and was not expected to help around the house.
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