Asking people out

[black mamba]

Yeah, I don't do that.

[cm]

Well here's my experience guys

I go to these places called brothels and some old Asian guy in a white suit with gold rolix's (emphasis on the 'i') on his wrist .

The old guy takes me in and shows me a line of 20 or so girls. I pick one, and then we go to a room in the back. The girl and I rub our genitals together. Before I leave, I tip both the old man in the suit and the lovely young lady.

Then I go the a clinic to get tested for STD's.

That's my dating experience guys. Just holler if you need any tips.

[tbw]

step#1: Talk to girl first (have a conversation)
step#2: If you hit it off ask for phone number or to meet again
step#3:
step#4: profit
Nothing ventured = nothing gained.

[DivaDancerLara]

I never ask guys out...however I do position myself in visable area and wear my favorite perfume...(AU DU STEAK)

[ConceptDesign]

Asking chicks out is easy. You just do it. Admittedly you can't just do any old broad, its gotta be one you've sized-up and has given you the okay signal.

If you get the KO, so fcuken what? Move on to the next piece of XX and get over yourself. In western anglophone nations there are more women than men... Numbers sonny Jim.

[keeper of the funk]

Jan 27, 2008 20:13:28 GMT -5 001 said:

Discuss your experiences with asking people out. For girls you can discuss when you got asked out, your feelings and thoughts.

HS - Never had the guts to ask anyone out.

College - Asked out a girl I had no chance with. Got shot down. She was 23 years old, I was 20. This is what I said to her "hey, theresa (I don't remember her name), can I talk with you for a minute?". Led her outside and wih a trembling voice "you are gorgeous, want to get some coffee sometimes?". She told me she was busy with graduate studies and didn't have time.

Wow, rejection hurts. Felt like I got punched in the stomach. I spent the rest of the day confused and dazed by the experience. However, rejection hurts a lot less than not knowing what could have been.

Post College - Never asked out anyone directly.

Jesus. If u really liked the girl you shoulda tried harder.

One thing about gorgeous women is they get asked for coffee/ lunch/ dinner all the time. They know your objective. They meet guys they think are being nice/ helpful and turns out all they want is sex.

Its just being busy with studies don't rly sound like flat out rejection to me.

I mean did you just leave it after this?

Y'know just chat with her, find stuff out, take an interest. maybe invite her to do something based on subjects that come up. If u make her laugh its good for both of you, cos it breaks the ice and eases some of that tension.

you still might get rejected and of course thier are times you just gotta move it along.

If u don't get her no. leave her with yours, maybe you could just chill, be friends. (Invite her to a house party, or some kind of social event where she will have to contact you for directions - then you got her no.)

TBH i can be Really (Really) shy, but I have managed to ask girls out with varying success (ain't no mack)

and I really disagree with your logic, rejection hurts, but its better to try than never know.

...if it goes well..don't get on that high too fast, cos girls change thier mind n stuff, if ur unlucky she could mess u abt and kinda fck with your mind, get your hopes up then leave you cold...which kinda intensifys that dazed/confused/frustrated feelin.

aiight, peace.

...and get some guts man

'Felt like i got punched in the stomach'

yeah, it sucks. but y'know how martial artists/boxers take hits in training to build up thier pain threashold.

If you put yourself out there, you get over little knocks faster. Save the emotial turmoil cos not every girl u ask out is gonna fall at your feet.

EDIT: aw s***, I should read stuff properly before i post. lol

[Aznlatina]

Just do it!

I've asked a guy out before. It was probably the most embarrassing thing I've ever done in my life. I don't regret it. At least, now I can say I did it with no regrets. Not many people have the guts to do it.

You know, it might be easy to do it and then when they say "uh....sorry....I'm not interested" or whatever B.S. they pull out of their hiney, you can start to giggle and then burst out into laughter and say, "I'm just kidding man....I just thought I'd say that to see what you'd say. It's just a joke." That way, you'd be clear of the repercussions of having to deal with the awkwardness that usually comes afterwards.

[...austhai/...]

I'm married.
But I do ask my hubby "Wanna go out to dinner tonight??"
Does that count?

[Emily]

Feb 1, 2008 18:15:42 GMT -5 Aznlatina said:

You know, it might be easy to do it and then when they say "uh....sorry....I'm not interested" or whatever B.S. they pull out of their hiney, you can start to giggle and then burst out into laughter and say, "I'm just kidding man....I just thought I'd say that to see what you'd say. It's just a joke." That way, you'd be clear of the repercussions of having to deal with the awkwardness that usually comes afterwards.

My advice is to proceed with caution with this "strategy." Very often, people can see right through it and you end up looking like even more of a loser. Then again, I guess it's also a matter of how obvious you've been about your interest prior to the actual asking out.

Just be a man about it. If a girl declines and acts all bitchy about you thinking you could date her, she's not worth it anyway.

[viruslabrat]

I totally agree with Emily. If someone tried that "Oh, I was just kidding" line I'd think they were a loser and it'd reinforce my decision not to go out with them.

I've never asked a guy out but if a shy guy I liked struck up a conversation with me and gave me an opening I'd take it. You just gotta find the opportunity to talk with her and look for similar interests then either of you could ask the other one out.

[thekrez]

Feb 1, 2008 23:41:02 GMT -5 @klacoste said:

Jan 29, 2008 7:35:31 GMT -5 ConceptDesign said:

In western anglophone nations there are more women than men... Numbers sonny Jim.

It's funny but true. I was perusing a book, Logic of Life, and women vastly outnumber men, especially in the inner-city. Apparently this is where most of the rich, educated men live.

And since women outnumber men, for women it's usually a race to the bottom as they try to undercut each other as it is guaranteed that some women will miss out. All a man has to do is sit back, keep in shape and rake in some decent money (emphasis on the latter). It's a pretty good gig if you're a guy, and IMO, worth the price of facing constant rejection. As you say, it's all about numbers.

Sorry eliminate all the fat, ugly, shocking personality women, and Ill think youll fine there are far more men than women. Thats even if you eliminate all the fat, ugly, shocking personality men.

I read the same articles as you and after getting over my initial joy that apparently all I had to do was sit back, realised that in actuality the number of women who any man would consider worth a go is actually far less than the number of men.

Its a universal truth that there will always be more competition for the beautiful, smart women, law of the jungle.

[avax]

But...I like tundra.

[avax]

Oh just do it.

[TotalWar]

Jan 27, 2008 20:13:28 GMT -5 001 said:

Discuss your experiences with asking people out. For girls you can discuss when you got asked out, your feelings and thoughts.

HS - Never had the guts to ask anyone out.

College - Asked out a girl I had no chance with. Got shot down. She was 23 years old, I was 20. This is what I said to her "hey, theresa (I don't remember her name), can I talk with you for a minute?". Led her outside and wih a trembling voice "you are gorgeous, want to get some coffee sometimes?". She told me she was busy with graduate studies and didn't have time.

Wow, rejection hurts. Felt like I got punched in the stomach. I spent the rest of the day confused and dazed by the experience. However, rejection hurts a lot less than not knowing what could have been.

Post College - Never asked out anyone directly.

Get over it. Most people, it hurts the first few times they get rejected in high school then they don't care anymore. I had a few bad experiences with crazy girls in high school and I let them get to me. I was pretty behind the curve myself when I got to college. It's going to take more than two tries before you get something like that right. Just forget about trying to "ask out" any one girl.

Just make sure you carry yourself well in all your social interactions, act confident, don't let anyone piss you off or degrade you, dress and look good. Confidence is the most important thing. I'm a naturally shy person and girls have misinterpreted that as me being attracted to them and tried to reject me when I really wasn't into them to begin with. As for stuttering, even the slickest public speaker does it sometimes. Just correct it and keep going and talk slower. There are a billion ways you can come up with to deal with social anxiety and shyness.

Spend a good $500-$1000 to upgrade your wardrobe if you have to. Hit the gym. Try to appreciate girls for something other than sex. Maybe even make friends with a few but don't let them use you and forget about ever having sex with them. They'll feel like they've been manipulated or betrayed. The ones you want, tease them. Don't get pissed when they tease you back but don't take any sh*t either. If you can't think of a witty reply, ignore them or change the subject. Don't try to be logical. They f**king hate logic. Be crazy and spontaneous. Be a rude scumbag if you have to, only make sure you do it with a grin on your face. Try to talk about fashion, gossip, relationships, celebrities, random emotional sh*t (how would you feel if... how would you react in this emotional situation... etc.) It might be sick, but that's what is necessary. Soon they'll be attracted to you and you'll be the one selecting them.

When it seems like one is attracted to you, don't ask them out on a date. Tell them what you're doing this weekend and tell them they can come along if they like. If it's dinner at a restaurant, you were going to eat there anyway. If its some masculine activity like paintball, just remember to bring a few girly magazines in case she gets bored and leave just as she's beginning to have fun. Try and have a life beyond work, school and introverted solitary hobbies so you actually have places to take her. Just keep them excited as long as you can.

Be mysterious, unpredictable... if that seems hard to do, it is. I've never had a relationship that appeared stable longer than a month and a half, but I that will improve I'm sure. Just... try to part gracefully and without getting stabbed in the back when you see signs that it's going south (my last breakup a few months ago was pretty nasty and I could have handled it better, pretty much over it now though). Oh, and be very careful of white trash (I did two years at a community college and... well I'm only human...). They think nothing of getting themselves pregnant with a guy they aren't married to when there is no way in hell they or their man can ensure a good life for the resulting child. It's part of their culture.