Did you go to private school? Was it worth it?

[Miyuki]

I was having a discussion today with my coworker who happened to go to a private school in Vancouver where I grew up. All of his cousins went to them since they were in Kindergarden. I'm wondering, for those of you who went, do you feel it was worth it? Not sure if you can answer that if it's the only thing you've known, but I was thinking about the topic today and I'm curious. If you had kids would you do the same for them? I was shocked to see the tution fees at one school, $14,500 per year! I wonder what the affects are on kids who are surrounded by people of generally all the same socio-economic background...

And while we're on the subject....what do you think of boarding schools? It seems absurd to me to send a child away from such a young age. Isn't it just buying your way out of parenting? I met a guy recently who had done the boarding school thing and he LOVED it.

[Emily]

Sept 10, 2008 6:58:04 GMT -5 Miyuki said:

I was having a discussion today with my coworker who happened to go to a private school in Vancouver where I grew up. All of his cousins went to them since they were in Kindergarden. I'm wondering, for those of you who went, do you feel it was worth it? Not sure if you can answer that if it's the only thing you've known, but I was thinking about the topic today and I'm curious. If you had kids would you do the same for them? I was shocked to see the tution fees at one school, $14,500 per year! I wonder what the affects are on kids who are surrounded by people of generally all the same socio-economic background...

And while we're on the subject....what do you think of boarding schools? It seems absurd to me to send a child away from such a young age. Isn't it just buying your way out of parenting? I met a guy recently who had done the boarding school thing and he LOVED it.

I went to a private school for my first year of high school. While I didn't hate it, I asked my parents to switch me out, because beyond my circle of friends, I didn't like the culture of the other kids. A 12-yr old kid should not be flaunting that his father is lawyer to this big shot CEO. That's your parent's accomplishment, not yours. Many of the kids were very money and status-oriented which wasn't interesting to me. (If it's any relevant, my family is downright middle-class.)

So, I decided to do the IB program in a public school instead, and that turned out to be the best option for me. It's funny, because when I think of it, my friends and most other students I did IB with were also middle-class, most of them upper middle-class that considered going to private, but opted for IB. The one difference was that our class was a majority of second-gen immigrants, which I found were people I got along with the most.

For all the whining and late nights during my years in IB, if my children show the academic inclination, I definitely want my children to go IB.

I have the same thoughts about you about boarding school, but I can't knock it because I've never tried it. As long as there are good schools/programs in my area, I don't think I would be able to send off my children to boarding school.

[halfbreed]

I've been going to private school (the same one) since preschool. Do a post search and see if you like the results.

[cm]

Sept 10, 2008 7:56:34 GMT -5 Emily said:

Sept 10, 2008 6:58:04 GMT -5 Miyuki said:

I was having a discussion today with my coworker who happened to go to a private school in Vancouver where I grew up. All of his cousins went to them since they were in Kindergarden. I'm wondering, for those of you who went, do you feel it was worth it? Not sure if you can answer that if it's the only thing you've known, but I was thinking about the topic today and I'm curious. If you had kids would you do the same for them? I was shocked to see the tution fees at one school, $14,500 per year! I wonder what the affects are on kids who are surrounded by people of generally all the same socio-economic background...

And while we're on the subject....what do you think of boarding schools? It seems absurd to me to send a child away from such a young age. Isn't it just buying your way out of parenting? I met a guy recently who had done the boarding school thing and he LOVED it.

I went to a private school for my first year of high school. While I didn't hate it, I asked my parents to switch me out, because beyond my circle of friends, I didn't like the culture of the other kids. A 12-yr old kid should not be flaunting that his father is lawyer to this big shot CEO. That's your parent's accomplishment, not yours. Many of the kids were very money and status-oriented which wasn't interesting to me. (If it's any relevant, my family is downright middle-class.)

So, I decided to do the IB program in a public school instead, and that turned out to be the best option for me. It's funny, because when I think of it, my friends and most other students I did IB with were also middle-class, most of them upper middle-class that considered going to private, but opted for IB. The one difference was that our class was a majority of second-gen immigrants, which I found were people I got along with the most.

For all the whining and late nights during my years in IB, if my children show the academic inclination, I definitely want my children to go IB.

I have the same thoughts about you about boarding school, but I can't knock it because I've never tried it. As long as there are good schools/programs in my area, I don't think I would be able to send off my children to boarding school.

I did IB in Modesto, CA and I found the very kids snotty.

[TeeHee]

Even though I don't have the fondest memories of my highschool days, it was the lesser/least of the evils, and in turn, best option for me given the circumstances. To give some background, the New Orleans/Louisiana education system wasn't exactly the most up to par compared to the rest of the nation, public schools anyway.

You generally had one of 3 options: public school, Catholic school(which was private), and private non-denominational school. Other than Benjamin Franklin High en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Benjamin_Franklin_Senior_High_School_(New_Orleans,_Louisiana)(which was way across town from where I lived) , there wasn't much hope with the public schools there. Even though I didn't attend public school myself, I had family and many family friends who did, most of whom shared similar stories of violence/fighting/bullying on campus that occured on a regular basis. Those friends didn't continue on to college after highschool. I imagine it would've been hard to focus on my studies with all that going on. Even though I came across my share of snotty classmates, again, I think it was the lesser of the evils. I attended private/Catholic school from kindergarten all the way thru 12th grade, as well as a few years in college(Loyola University of New Orleans). The highschool part happened to be all-girls as well. It cost roughly $2000-3000 per school year, prior to uni. I got good grades, and the highschool I attended had a good reputation, which I suppose looked good on my resume when it came to getting into uni. Then with private non-denominational, there was Newman en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isidore_Newman_School, in which the tuition is near $15,000/year for pre-K thru 5th, and $17,500/year for 6th thru 12th grades; so that route was out of the question. And even though it's generally classified as "non-denominational", majority of their student body is Jewish, so their events and times/days off were scheduled around Jewish holidays. So either way, there wasn't really much option for getting around a private school that didn't have some religion, if that's what you're looking for.

Since leaving Louisiana and moving out here to Phoenix, AZ, it's different, and we/my brother have no issue with him attending public school here, not to mention considering our financial state post-Katrina. I suppose if he somehow got a grant in which he could attend a private school for free, we wouldn't be opposed to it, but it's not like there's any need for it at this point. I guess my answer, in short, would be that it depends where you are.

[LaFace]

Going against the trend, I'm pro-private school.

I think their academic record (at least in Australia) speaks for itself, and this to me is probably the most important thing in terms of choosing a high school (of course there are other things such as facilities, safety etc).

I also think they are generally more stricter, which is good because it means they don't take s*** from students that are trouble-makers. Having said that, it's common knowledge that every school has at least a few bad seeds.

Anyway this is from my experience in my state.

It may be different around the world.

Personally, if money isn't an issue, I wouldn't know why you wouldn't want to send your children to a private school? Serious question, and one that I would like to read the answers to. Again, I'm purely speaking from what I know about schools in my state.

[andrew6712]

I went to a private christian school for one year, it was basically the same as a public with just a little religion mixed in. In my opinion, your just wasting money.

[meep]

I never went to a private school... I went to a government selective school instead, which is somewhat different to normal government schools in that there is a stronger academic drive and competition. From what I've heard, private schools are filled with bimbo dumb asses who are spoon fed to memorise essays for their higher school certificate.

A somewhat harsh and perhaps inaccurate generalisation...?

I know people who have gone to top notch $20 000 a year private schools but f***ed up academically, and also people who have gone to their local government high school but aced the higher school certificate... At the end of the day, its based on the individual to determine whether or not private schools are worth all that money.... who they will mingle with, what their interests are, their personality and goals in life etc

(But how cliche).

Personally, I don't think its fair that someone with more money is able to get a so called 'better' education in a safer environment with better facilities... But such is life, I suppose.

[dannyd]

Unfortunately, in many cases people who go to private schools do have the head start in life. I'm not just talking about run of the mill private religious schools, but the top schools, the GPS, CAS etc schools. Yes mark achievement is up to the individual, but there is no doubt in my mind that the ones who do it at a public school have achieved beyond their private counterparts. Not only do you have the 'spoon feeding' and pastoral care at the private schools that public schools don't offer, distractions can be dealt with at private schoolsby simple expulsion, on account of their 'huge' waiting lists.

Just as Robyn has met $20,000 a year private school students flunk , I have met $20,000 a year private school student dumbarses who achieve marks ranging from the mid 80's to early 90's. The learning environment, when you pay for it, is easier.

Educational environment aside, at private schools, rich people mix with other rich people. You remain in these circles far after school and the 'it isn't what you know but who you know' theme that starts to bear fruit for alot of them. I know people who have top notch jobs due merely this private school nepotism.

There are certainly benefits to those $$ that go to a private school education if you manage to raise your kids without thinking the world owes them something.

Personally I agree with Robyn on the fairness point. In my book my (future, not yet born) kids are either smart enough to go to James Ruse Ag School (a selective, very high achieving government school) or they are going to have to work for what they get like most other people.

Plus, I'd hate to pump $100,000 into a kids education to have him turn into a private school cliche.

[betahat]

I went to a private high school (with IB program) after a decade of public schooling in Canada (granted, in a small town, Halifax, NS, where there aren't any really good public schools - my wife went to one of the best public schools in the US on Long Island which sends lots of kids to top universities). The difference in terms of standards was pretty large, partly due to the greater discipline inside and out of the classroom, partly due to the higher caliber of student (and teacher - private school teachers sometimes get paid less, which means they are doing it for the love of teaching and the love of teaching kids who are not totally out of control), and partly due to much higher expectations - they were not teaching down. Fees were about 7K a year but I got a full scholarship. The school had entrance requirements but there were certainly people at my school who weren't that smart, and who struggled to get through university as B- or C students.

Strategically, I'm not sure that going to a private school is always your best ticket into a good university. Sometimes it is better to finish at the top of a large public school, as universities look for "diversity" and don't just want the same rich kids from the same private schools (even though they are vastly over-represented). HOWEVER, unless you have really good public schools in your area (which depends on how rich a neighborhood you live in really and how much you pay in property taxes) private school will give you a leg up when you actually get to university. A lot of kids who coast through public schools with high grades (I'm talking about the North American system where there isn't a standardized test at the end to compare achievement between high school students) struggle through the first few years of university. Many of them catch up eventually (and in time to get it together for grad school) but not all. A private school education, at least for high school (I feel like it might be wasted in elementary, though someone could prove me wrong) could be a real boost for university. Having said that, I can't believe how much some of these schools cost and I'm not sure the benefits necessarily outweigh the costs as long as public schools are decent and your kid/self is not totally bored in the public school.

[cm]

My IB program was in the middle of the ghetto of Modesto. There were barely any kids from the area in the IB program, while all these kids from the wealthy area of town were going to the school. It was a school within a school. The education system is a f***ing joke.

[viruslabrat]

This bimbo dumb ass thinks that private school could be waste of time. I went to a public school up until the 7th grade. Sending your primary/elementary school-aged kid to a private school is just such a waste of money. In high school it can help to go private if you're unfortunate enough to live in a "ghetto". I personally went to a cheap Catholic high school ($1800 - $2500 a year). I hated the religious aspect but I did well and I made a bunch of lifetime friends. I'm sure I could have done well in just a public high school and made friends there too but who knows, I might have gotten a little derailed along the way considering my personal circumstances and the type of people you're more likely to find at a public high school. I think Perth Modern is the only academically selective high school in Perth and they only went back to being a selective high school after I graduated. I wouldn't have been smart enough to go to the only selective school in Perth anyway. Maybe I'll send my kids to a private high school but that's a looong way into the future. I'm guessing by then public education will fall further down the craphole it's already in.

[Emily]

Sept 11, 2008 2:06:43 GMT -5 LaFace said:

Personally, if money isn't an issue, I wouldn't know why you wouldn't want to send your children to a private school?

I don't like the idea of my children most likely spending time with other students who don't have their priorities in the right place, as in valuing money and status. Not saying that all private school kids are like that, far from it. Just that odds are there'll be more of this type of person at private schools. Mind you, that's just my own experience. I don't think that private school I attended gave any scholarships to deserving students lacking funds, so it was pretty homogeneous.

I guess a very local experience also taints a bit my view of private schools. Every 10th grader in the province has to take the same final government-issued exam. When I was in 9th grade, a few 10th graders managed to get their hands on a copy of the exam before the examination. A network involving my school and two of the near-by private schools took off and people were buying off the exam. The students were caught and while my school went public saying there were indeed delinquents who had cheated the other schools denied everything, because their students were obviously without beyond reproach. They didn't want to get any negative publicity.

That's just not the type of message I want my kids to get.

Hey, if I have no choice and the public system where I live is dysfunctional and/or there's no IB program or a similar program, sure I'll send my children to a private school.

Otherwise, I've found that most products of (public) IB, TAG (Talented and Gifted - lol, pretentious much?), other programs where they push the students academically and socially to have turned out pretty well. Why spend the money on a private school if it can be used on something else?

[Miyuki]

Sept 14, 2008 18:57:20 GMT -5 Emily said:

Sept 11, 2008 2:06:43 GMT -5 LaFace said:

Personally, if money isn't an issue, I wouldn't know why you wouldn't want to send your children to a private school?

I don't like the idea of my children most likely spending time with other students who don't have their priorities in the right place, as in valuing money and status.

I agree with this. Private school wouldn't necessarily be a "given" if I could afford to send my kids to one. I want my kids to learn among a diverse group of kids, from all different sorts of socio-economic backgrounds.

Thank you to everyone who has responded to this post so far. It's so interesting to hear about all of your experiences! I was shocked at the tuition costs and wondered how much of a headstart private school kids actually got.

So, bascially this is what I've gotten from you guys...

PROS
- Better academic results.
-Stricter.
-Better learning environment.
-Access to connections.
-Better preparation for Uni.

CONS
-Peers who are money and status oriented.
-Violence and bullying on campus.

Noone mentioned the uniforms. I think they're a pro because they take away the whole "Guess Jeans" phenomenon (I'm dating myself here. ;D). Noone mentioned better sports teams. Some of the private schools in Vancouver had amazing sports teams. Um, what else......better funding=better field trips, better school plays, better equipment at school.

Basically, if it weren't for all the rich kids at private schools, I think they'd be an awesome place to go to school. ;D It's too bad this kind of education is only for people who can afford it.

[TeeHee]

Sept 15, 2008 16:33:28 GMT -5 Miyuki said:

PROS
- Better academic results.
-Stricter.
-Better learning environment.
-Access to connections.
-Better preparation for Uni.

CONS
-Peers who are money and status oriented.
-Violence and bullying on campus.

hmm, is this referring to public or private school? because the "violence and bullying on campus" I referred to was with public school, in which none of the pros you listed wouldn't apply.

Noone mentioned the uniforms. I think they're a pro because they take away the whole "Guess Jeans" phenomenon (I'm dating myself here. ;D).

They can be a pro in that way, but where I'm originally from...towards latter years, both types of schools(public and private) incorporated uniforms into their schools. Then again, even with everyone wearing uniforms, it was still pretty easy to tell which uniforms were for which schools.