Straight, Gay, Bi, Transgender???

[spaciesiren]

Are they any gays in the house?! How does your asian side of the family take it?

[LaFace]

Hi spaciesiren, and welcome to the site.

I know of one bisexual on the site that is a woman, although there could be others and I'm just simply unaware of them, as I don't really pay too much attention to people's specific orientations.

I myself am 100% heterosexual, however if I was gay, I think my Filipino side of the family would still accept me.

To generalise, Filipinos are quite accepting of gay and bisexual people. Even though the country is very religious, I think Filipinos believe in the notion of loving all kinds of people first and foremost, and therefore gay and bisexual people are included in this.

[betahat]

I asked a similar question in a post earlier about Prop 8 in California. It appears there aren't any (openly) gay members here. I do have an EA friend who is bisexual but she's settled down with a guy for a few years now - I think her parents (Asian dad/white mom) were pretty cool with it, but they were musician hippie types. One would hope that people open minded enough to have an interracial marriage would also be open to homosexuality (there is definitely a liberal bias among posters here) but gay marriage went down here in California despite Samuel L Jackson's valiant attempt to link the struggle for gay marriage with the interracial marriage bans that were in place until the Loving 1967 Supreme court case.

Apparently, pre-election polling had California Asian-Americans 57% opposed to Proposition 8, but the final exit polls show that the Asian-Americans voted 49% Yes 51% No which is exactly the same proportion as white voters. So in California, at least, it doesn't seem like the "Asian" side of anyone's family would be any more likely to be homophobic (or opposed to gay marriage) than the White side. We also have what is probably the world's most high-profile Eurasian gay couple, which would be George Takei and his husband.

www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2008/results/polls/#val=CAI01p1
www.advocate.com/news_detail_ektid63857.asp

Anyway, care to share your own experiences?

[meep]

I work with a half Filipino, half Anglo girl and she is homosexual and very open about it. I don't know if her parents know, but assuming in that she is so open about her sexuality they probably do. Hmm theres a lot of assuming going on there...
Personally, I am straight and if I were gay, my Asian side of whom mostly reside in communist china (which isn't really that communist) would probably not understand. My mother, who is Australian (Chinese-Australian) would most likely be more understanding as she has friends who are gay themselves.

[dead0baby0chick]

I'm bi. My Asian family doesn't take it at all since I would never tell them. There are definitely a few others on the site, but I'll let them speak for themselves, I'm not about to out anyone. ;D

[Paddy]

My sister was gay...for a while.

I think in her youth she was very experimental (and not just with sex). She went out with a girl for a few years during her mid-20s, but I believe she's been with guys ever since. My other sister asked her about her lesbianism, and she replied 'Oh I'm not a lesbian, I'm just in love with a woman.'

There was much head scratching.

It was around this time that my sister got married with a gay Malaysian fella, so that he could qualify for UK residency (very naughty). I was the only family member at the ceremony. I was also the only straight person there. So there was me, then aged 17, in a room full of homosexuals trying desperately to hold back their sniggers as my gay sister and her gay husband kissed before the registrar.

As for myself, yeah I'm straight, though I know how to appreciate a good looking fella. Many people have questioned my orientation - it's quite simple to explain - guys just don't give me a hard-on. I could never be gay.

And as for the attitudes of my Asian family, I have a gay cousin. His parents were disappointed when they found out, but have come to accept him and his boyfriend. His boyfriend, Aaron, came on strongly to me during a family wedding - insisting I was gay and nibbling my ears and grinding with me on the dance floor and so on.

Th family, rather than being disgusted, thought it was hilarious, though I think my cousin was quite jealous.

[avax]

Nov 11, 2008 20:41:26 GMT -5 betahat said:

One would hope that people open minded enough to have an interracial marriage would also be open to homosexuality (there is definitely a liberal bias among posters here) ...

No, not really. There are plenty of racist mixed families.

I'd add it's also a misnomer that gays are tolerant of each other. There's definitely discrimination (of other sexual orientations/preferences) in the gay community.

Mixed families tolerant of gays? Maybe.

Accepted? Mostly, no.

There is also the influence of anglo-christian (europeanized) religions and ideas about right and wrong. This tends to trickle downwards even in mixed families. And guess what? If the "eur" in eurasian isn't religious, the other (non-european) side likely had their backside colonized out of them and they too have adopted those concepts of right or wrong.

[betahat]

You raise an interesting point Celtriya, but unfortunately we don't really have any data to sort it out (unless someone has done a large random sample of EAs - I admit that people on this board may not be representative, though I haven't found any people here to be particularly intolerant of homosexuality). I'm obviously talking about a statistical relationship and not a law of Newtonian physics.

As for there being plenty of "racist mixed families" I buy that tolerance of some races - say Caucasians for Asians and Asians for Caucasians - need not imply tolerance of all races - say Latinos or Blacks - but I find it hard to buy that the average Asian in a mixed marriage to a white (or vice versa) would be more racist against some third race than one not in a mixed marriage.

But you are dead-right about the role of religion in this debate. When you look at what influenced people's votes on Prop 8, by FAR the most important variable is how frequently you attend church - more so than race, age, income, or sex. The fact that more latinos and blacks voted against gay marriage than whites or Asians, and the fact that older people tended to vote against gay marriage more than younger people, is largely explicable by the tendency for the former groups to attend churches.

[manitjotirat]

Hey there, I'm gay and I'm proud of it:) anyone else out there?

[straylight]

i am a lesbian trapped in a man's body

[straylight]

not transgendered. i am an executive transvestite.

and a donut.

[juancarlos]

Nov 11, 2008 20:34:53 GMT -5 LaFace said:

Hi spaciesiren, and welcome to the site.

I know of one bisexual on the site that is a woman, although there could be others and I'm just simply unaware of them, as I don't really pay too much attention to people's specific orientations.

I myself am 100% heterosexual, however if I was gay, I think my Filipino side of the family would still accept me.

To generalise, Filipinos are quite accepting of gay and bisexual people. Even though the country is very religious, I think Filipinos believe in the notion of loving all kinds of people first and foremost, and therefore gay and bisexual people are included in this.

I have to disagree with you on this one. Philippine society is not accepting of gay and bisexual people. Generally, your family will completely disown you, as they will face tremendous shame in the community. You will be harassed at school, work and walking down the streets. As an example, my high school year book alone records at least three derogatory terms for gay people, and I grew up in an urban environment (not the provinces).

[LaFace]

Dec 1, 2008 5:34:03 GMT -5 juancarlos said:

Nov 11, 2008 20:34:53 GMT -5 LaFace said:

Hi spaciesiren, and welcome to the site.

I know of one bisexual on the site that is a woman, although there could be others and I'm just simply unaware of them, as I don't really pay too much attention to people's specific orientations.

I myself am 100% heterosexual, however if I was gay, I think my Filipino side of the family would still accept me.

To generalise, Filipinos are quite accepting of gay and bisexual people. Even though the country is very religious, I think Filipinos believe in the notion of loving all kinds of people first and foremost, and therefore gay and bisexual people are included in this.

I have to disagree with you on this one. Philippine society is not accepting of gay and bisexual people. Generally, your family will completely disown you, as they will face tremendous shame in the community. You will be harassed at school, work and walking down the streets. As an example, my high school year book alone records at least three derogatory terms for gay people, and I grew up in an urban environment (not the provinces).

^When you talk about Filipino society, are you talking about societies within the actual country itself, or those that are the result of immigration to overseas countries, namely Westernised ones such as the US, Australia etc?

Secondly, regardless of whether you are talking about the Philippines or immigrants to other countries, is what you're saying in reference to Spanish mestizo society?

[juancarlos]

LaFace,

I am speaking in terms of both the actual country itself and Filipino communities in the West. Of course, the more "Westernized" and detached from the Philippines itself one is, generally the less stigma they have for gay and bisexual people. It comes mainly from the Roman Catholic upbringing, and so Spanish mestizos are not exempt from it either.

That's the reason why there are so many Filipinos who remain in the closet lest their families find out. If you're in doubt of what I'm saying, ask your Filipino relatives their opinions on this.

JC

[LaFace]

I believe our views certainly differ on this issue in terms of Filipinos, which is fine.

From what I have seen, the ones that are more 'Westernised' and hence detached from the Philippines are generally associated with more stigma for gay and bisexual people, because I still feel as though these people are often looked down upon by society in general, compared to Philippines specifically (and not Asia). I know that there is the Roman Catholic upbringing, which I have myself, however from my observations it seems as though despite the church's disapproval of such orientations, the Filipino people with these same Catholic beliefs are quite accepting of gays/bisexuals.

My family is very Roman Catholic, and also very accepting of gay people, and I can say the same for many Filipino families that I know around my state.

I'm honestly surprised at your post, however I know you wouldn't write something without a foundation for it JC, so perhaps there may be a difference amongst Filipinos in America (or a particular state in the US), and Filipinos in Australia. I will give it some more thought.

Quite interesting though.

If there's anything you'd like to add, I'm definitely interested in more discussion, and this includes any other Filipinos out there who would like to add something to the topic.