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Post by jericho on Nov 30, 2008 7:00:58 GMT -5
Anyone experienced it? I never really dated anyone I worked with. Nowadays I work in Japan, and workplace relationships are kept on the down low here. Japanese are enormous gossipers and kids can be worse. I work at a Junior High and some of my kids see me with a person of opposite gender outside of school and immediately think I am dating her. Truth be told I actually like one of the teachers at my workplace. But have no idea how romance and things of that nature work in a Japanese workplace. Having only been here four months I still don't quite know how to approach such things as telling someone you like them. It's all very unfamiliar to me. I did speak to one of my colleagues at a conference and she told me she met her husband whilst working together at a Junior High School. She said they kept their relationship a secret until they weren't working together anymore or something like that. Teachers get moved around a lot here too. Some every three years. Anyways it's all very iffy to me. I was wondering if anyone had office romances and if they were successful and whatnot? Did it become awkward when it soured? Did others find out? Also if you have any idea how relationships work in Japanese workplaces that would be appreciated too.
Discuss plz kthnx.
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Post by swinger on Nov 30, 2008 8:55:13 GMT -5
have no idea how romance and things of that nature work in a Japanese workplace. Having only been here four months I still don't quite know how to approach such things as telling someone you like them. It's all very unfamiliar to me. It is the same as it is in the US, Canada, and Europe (all places I have worked). Don't worry about the 'mystery' of Japanese romance - it's the same as romance anywhere else. Just think about all the successes you had back home, all the girls you dated, how much they liked you, etc., and put the same face forward in Japan. Good looks and personality work across national and cultural boundaries. Just go for it like you usually do.
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Post by straylight on Nov 30, 2008 14:57:18 GMT -5
Yes..
Although I'd say it's better to date a peer. Not a subordinate or superior. It all depends on the company, of course. I worked for a corporation that had rules on "fraternizing" and possible preferential treatment because of the relationship, and almost got my boss fired (for strange reasons, they didn't care about me..).
If it's a small business, you or your boss can make up the rules.
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Post by jericho on Nov 30, 2008 17:06:58 GMT -5
I'd say she's a peer, I just stand out more being the only foreigner in the workplace.
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Post by straylight on Nov 30, 2008 18:02:38 GMT -5
I don't know anything about teachers.. It's a unique situation when maybe even peer relationships might have some negative side effects (I don't know what, but I'm sure some party pooper has thought of something ;D ).
I don't think you should concern yourself with being a foreigner though.
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Post by helles on Nov 30, 2008 20:34:19 GMT -5
Asians are a gossipy bunch, esp office girls.
My old company, people would date but people from different teams/departments and mostly on the downlow, but people find out somehow. I have noticed that when the locals start dating, its long term, i barely ever heard of any breakups, but its obviously gonna be awkward.. maybe thats why turnover rates are high?!
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Post by yongfook on Dec 1, 2008 1:11:26 GMT -5
dude, don't be that JET that bangs one of the teachers and messes up the whole vibe of the staffroom.
there's like a billion other girls outside the office, bang those ones instead.
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Post by jericho on Dec 1, 2008 3:07:54 GMT -5
^ Hahaha, very true.
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Post by sass in a glass on Dec 1, 2008 12:58:58 GMT -5
yes. i met my current bf through work place although we only dated after i quit the job
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Post by Paddy on Dec 3, 2008 11:56:34 GMT -5
There's always someone monitoring the intranet. And it's often the boss in his boss's chair...
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Post by jericho on Dec 3, 2008 16:39:21 GMT -5
I would rather not date someone from the workplace. I can understand when ppl keep it a secret from their co-workers or only date ppl from other departments (the kind you don't interact w/) Yeah, I can see how that can affect a lot of aspects of work life, like morale, productivity and team chemistry.
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Post by swinger on Dec 8, 2008 12:24:21 GMT -5
..any updates from November 30th? Did the teacher get Ichigo Jammed? Did the lunchroom vibe get spoiled? Is the principal's desk chair now in disrepair? I love these interesting threads and hate how they never follow up. Internets, man.
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Post by dead0baby0chick on Dec 9, 2008 15:50:05 GMT -5
I've made it a rule to be really careful about this. I do occasionally date people I work with (because that's one of the main ways I socialize: at work), but I try to make sure I'm really interested before I do anything. Cause I've had very bad situations pop up because I dated someone I worked with for convenience's sake, even though I didn't really like said person...and then all these f***ed up extenuating circumstances popped up. So I didn't see work person anymore, only still had to see them when I went to work. Which sucks hairy ass crack. Obviously.
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Post by straylight on Dec 9, 2008 16:07:10 GMT -5
^ Yep
Yep, that's all I got. ;D
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Post by Subuatai on Dec 10, 2008 7:29:57 GMT -5
Well, I actually regretted quite a few times leaving behind top girls from the workplace. =/ But risking my job for a relationship... I guess it's not really worth it - new girls do come along as I've noticed. But there's always the thought that rings in your mind "What if"
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