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Post by Nikki on Oct 2, 2007 22:01:20 GMT -5
Important Questions to ask anyone before you decide to love them.
More importantly, what are your answers?
1. Let us assume you met a rudimentary magician. Let us assume he can do five simple tricks-- he can pull a rabbit out of his hat, he can make a coin disappear, he can turn the ace of spades into the Joker card, and the others in a similar vein. These are his only tricks and he can't learn any more; he can only do these five. HOWEVER, it turns out he's doing these five magic tricks with real magic. It's not an illusion; he can actually conjure the bunny out of the ether and he can move the coin through space. He's legitimately magical, but extremely limited in scope and influence. Would this person be more impressive than Albert Einstein?
2. Let us assume there are two boxes on a table. In one box, there is a relatively normal turtle; in the other Adolf Hitler's skull. You have to select one of these items for your home. If you select the turtle, you can't give it away and you have to keep it alive for two years; if either of these parameters are not met, you will be fined $999 by the state. If you select Hitler's skull, you are required to display it in a semi-prominent location in your living room for the same amount of time, although you will be paid a stipend of $120 dollars per month for doing so. Display of the skull must be apolitical. Which option do you select?
3. You meet the perfect person. Romantically, this person is ideal: You find them physically attractive, intellectually stimulating, consistently funny, and deeply compassionate. However, they have one quirk: This individual is obsessed with Jim Henson's gothic puppet fantasy The Dark Crystal. Beyond watching it on DVD at least once a month, he/she peppers casual conversation with Dark Crystal references, uses Dark Crystal analogies to explain everyday events, and occasionally likes to talk intensely about the film's "deeper philosophy." Would this be enough to stop you from marrying this individual?
4. You meet a wizard in downtown Chicago. The wizard tells you he can make you more attractive if you pay him money. When you ask how this process works, the wizard points to a random person on the street. You look at this random stranger. The wizard says, "I will now make them a dollar more attractive." He waves his magic wand. Ostensibly, this person does not change at all; as far as you can tell, nothing is different. But-- somehow-- this person is suddenly more appealing. The tangible difference is invisible to the naked eye, but you can't deny that this person is vaguely sexier. This wizard has a weird rule, though-- you can only pay him once. You can't keep giving him money until you're satisfied. You can only pay him one lump sum up front. How much cash do you give the wizard?
5. Every person you have ever slept with is invited to a banquet where you are the guest of honor. No one will be in attendance except you, the collection of former lovers, and the catering service. After the meal, you are asked to give a 15 minute speech to the assembly. What do you talk about?
6. You work in an office. Generally, you are popular with your coworkers. However, you discover there are currently two rumors circulating in the office gossip mill, and both involve you. The first rumor is that you got drunk at the office holiday party and had sex with one of your coworkers. This rumor is completely true, but most people don't believe it. The second rumor is that you have been stealing hundreds of dollars of office supplies (and then selling them to cover a gambling debt). This rumor is completely false, but virtually everyone assumes it is factual. Which of these two rumors is most troubling to you?
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Post by Ave` on Oct 2, 2007 23:33:39 GMT -5
Im suspicious if any man could answer all this in one go. Either he didnt feel like he need to play another game or he just wanted to get into your knickers. So, yeah it would be KEY questions to find potetial suitors :]
*typos*
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Post by xandra on Oct 3, 2007 0:04:37 GMT -5
some more probing question.
Let us assume a fully grown, completely healthy Clydesdale horse has his hooves shackled to the ground while his head is held in place with a thick rope. He is conscious and standing upright, but completely immobile. And let us assume that-for some reason- every political prisoner on earth has cited by Amnesty International) will be released from captivity if you can kick this horse to death in less than twenty minutes. You are allowed to wear steel toed boots. WOULD YOU ATTEMPT TO DO THIS?
You meet your soul mate. However, there is a catch: every three years, someone will break both of your soulmate's collarbones with a Cresent wrench, and there is only one way you can stop this from happening: you must swallow a pill that will make every song you hear-for the rest of your life- sound as if it's being performed by the band Alice In Chains. When you hear Credence Clearwater Revival on the radio, it will sound (to your ears) like it's being played by Alice In Chains. If you see Radiohead live, every one of their tunes will sound like it's being covered by Alice In Chains. When you hear a commercial jingle on TV, it will sound like Alice in Chains; if you sing to yourself in the shower, your voice will sound like deceased Alice vocalist Layne Staley performing a capella (but it will only sound this way to you). WOULD YOU SWALLOW THE PILL?
At long last, someone invents "the dream VCR". This machine allows you to tape an entire evening's worth of your own dreams, which you can then watch at your leisure. However, the inventor of the dream VCR will only allow you to use this device if you agree to a strange caveat: when you watch your dreams, you must do so with your family and your closest friends in the same room. They get to watch your dreams along with you. And if you don't agree to this, you can't use the dream VCR. WOULD YOU STILL DO THIS?
For reasons that cannot be explained, cats can sudddenly read on a twelfth-grade level. They can't write, but they can read silently and understand the text. Many cats love this new skill, because they now have something to do while they lay around the house; however, a few cats become depressed, because reading forces them to realize the limitations of their own existence (not to mention the utter frustration of being unable to express themselves). THAT BEING THE CASE, DO YOU THINK THE AVERAGE CAT WOULD ENJOY GARFIELD, OR WOULD CATS FIND THIS CARTOON TO BE AN INSULTING CARICATURE?
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Post by teek on Oct 3, 2007 0:17:41 GMT -5
and yet even more probing questions:
Let us assume you are walking through the woods, and deep in the woods you find a Fox caught in a rabbit trap by its hind leg. Now the fox is severely injured and lost an excessive amount of blood. It is such an amount the fox is most likely going to die. This fox has been killing lots of the vermin rabbits in the woods, but he has also been killing the farmers chickens. The amount of rabbits it kills outnumbers the chickens by 5. THAT BEING THE CASE, DO YOU RELEASE THE FOX AND LET IT KEEP KILLING RABBITS, DO YOU KILL IT TO BE HUMANE, DO YOU KILL IT TO APPEASE THE FARMER OR DO YOU RELEASE IT TO ALLOW IT TO DIE IN THE WILD WITHOUT HUMAN INTERACTION.
Let us assume you have just entered a 7-11 and paid $1.75 for a Large Slurpee. As you approach the Slurpee machine you see a large sign on the Slurpee handle that reads, "NOT YET FULLY FROZEN". Some of the slurpee in the machine is frozen, but not enough to fill a large cup and the rest is liquid. You look over to the counter and realise the Attendant has gone out the back and won't be back for some time and you cannot get a refund. THAT BEING THE CASE, DO YOU TAKE A MEDIUM SIZE CUP AND FILL THAT WITH FROZEN SLURPEE CLEARLY LOSING SOME VALUE, OR DO YOU TAKE THE LARGE CUP AND FILL IT WITH HALF FROZEN, HALF LIQUID SLURPEE, OR DO YOU WAIT BY THE COUNTER FOR A LONG TIME TO GET A REFUND, OR DO YOU FILL A MEDIUM CUP WITH FROZEN SLURPEE AND STEAL WHATEVER YOU CAN FROM THE SHELVES BEFORE THE ATTENDANT COMES BACK AS MEANS OF COMPENSATION AND REVENGE.
Let us assume, you walk into a bar, and the barman says, "Why the long face?" THAT BEING THE CASE, DO YOU SIT DOWN AND SAY NOTHING, OR DO YOU RAM A HORSE UP HIS ARSE?
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Post by Nikki on Oct 3, 2007 1:24:23 GMT -5
Man, you all are failing miserably. I wouldn't date any of you . Especially you Alex - answering questions with morequestions. The nerve. (But yes, you can tell what I've been reading lately.)
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Post by thekrez on Oct 3, 2007 1:29:59 GMT -5
Only one question matters.
How big is it?
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Post by xandra on Oct 3, 2007 1:46:55 GMT -5
Man, you all are failing miserably. I wouldn't date any of you . Especially you Alex - answering questions with morequestions. The nerve. (But yes, you can tell what I've been reading lately.) if I had known you were trying to date me I would have gone about things differently. allow me to attempt to actually answer your questions. 1. in the long run i think Albert Einstein would be more impressive. 5 simple tricks can only go so far. 2. turtle. they live long so it wouldn't be too hard to keep it alive, and there's no way I would want hitler's skull displayed in my living room. unless I could make a political statement about it. 3. the dark crystal thing might be cute and quirky at first, but could soon become a deal breaker. at the very least it would get really really boring quickly. 4. are you allowed to ask more questions before coming up with a lump sum? i would be tempted to pay about $50-$100 because, well... why not? 5. oh good lord. knowing me, i would probably talk about how awkward it was in an attempt to be funny. but mostly it would just be awkward. 6. hmm... i would find it troubling that people believed that i was stealing office supplies and selling them. the other rumour wouldn't be so troubling since people didn't believe it, although it would be troubling that i had actually done something so stupid.
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Post by xandra on Oct 3, 2007 1:50:12 GMT -5
zoff, clearly we are not meant to be.
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Post by waywardwolf on Oct 3, 2007 2:11:26 GMT -5
These are all strange questions to ask someone you're keen on, but I've got nothing to do.
Let us assume you met a rudimentary magician. Let us assume he can do five simple tricks. it turns out he's doing these five magic tricks with real magic. Would this person be more impressive than Albert Einstein? No, not unless he had to study magic as long and with as much devotion as Einstein had to study.
Turtle vs. Hitler's skull Which option do you select? The turtle, life is more important than remembering Hitler.
You meet the perfect person. This individual is obsessed with Jim Henson's gothic puppet fantasy The Dark Crystal. she peppers casual conversation with Dark Crystal references, uses Dark Crystal analogies to explain everyday events, and occasionally likes to talk intensely about the film's "deeper philosophy." Would this be enough to stop you from marrying this individual? Yes, despite how attractive and intelligent I found her, I wouldn't think she was very original or living in the moment.
You meet a wizard in downtown Chicago. The wizard tells you he can make you more attractive if you pay him money. How much cash do you give the wizard? Nothing, I wouldn't trust a strange wizard at all.
Every person you have ever slept with is invited to a banquet where you are the guest of honor. What do you talk about? The thrill of living in the moment.
True rumor vs. false rumor Which of these two rumors is most troubling to you? The false rumor, no point in trying to escape the truth.
let us assume that-for some reason- every political prisoner on earth has cited by Amnesty International) will be released from captivity if you can kick this horse to death in less than twenty minutes. WOULD YOU ATTEMPT TO DO THIS? No, it's not the horse's fault.
every three years, someone will break both of your soulmate's collarbones with a Cresent wrench or you must swallow a pill that will make every song you hear-for the rest of your life- sound as if it's being performed by the band Alice In Chains. WOULD YOU SWALLOW THE PILL? Yes, I love music, but not as much as my soulmate.
This machine allows you to tape an entire evening's worth of your own dreams, but you must do so with your family and your closest friends in the same room. WOULD YOU STILL DO THIS? No, I'm not sure I'd like to watch all of my dreams anyway.
For reasons that cannot be explained, cats can sudddenly read on a twelfth-grade level. DO YOU THINK THE AVERAGE CAT WOULD ENJOY GARFIELD, OR WOULD CATS FIND THIS CARTOON TO BE AN INSULTING CARICATURE? I think they'd be insulted on the basis that Garfield displays no hunter-like instincts.
Let us assume you are walking through the woods, and deep in the woods you find a Fox caught in a rabbit trap by its hind leg. DO YOU RELEASE THE FOX AND LET IT KEEP KILLING RABBITS, DO YOU KILL IT TO BE HUMANE, DO YOU KILL IT TO APPEASE THE FARMER OR DO YOU RELEASE IT TO ALLOW IT TO DIE IN THE WILD WITHOUT HUMAN INTERACTION? Release it and let it keep killing rabbits. Damn farmers and their traps.
Slurpee conundrum. Half frozen slurpee, half slurpee liquid. I think I might prefer it that way. Sounds good.
Let us assume, you walk into a bar, and the barman says, "Why the long face?" THAT BEING THE CASE, DO YOU SIT DOWN AND SAY NOTHING, OR DO YOU RAM A HORSE UP HIS ARSE? Sit down and say nothing, then later, tell him my story. I don't know why bartenders don't do that sort of thing anymore.
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swordcane
Junior Member
~quappuccino~
Posts: 116
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Post by swordcane on Oct 3, 2007 2:39:12 GMT -5
1) The magician. This is someone in modern times doing things that were previously only done in fiction, myth, and legend.
2) Hitler's skull. I'd treat it as a piece of history and charge people money to see it, putting all of the money plus the stipend towards charity.
3) I love The Dark Crystal, but this would wear on me quickly. If after talking to them about this it was clear they wouldn't change, I would have to leave, but only after staying for longer than I should have.
4) I would ask in whose opinion would I be more attractive. Unless it was in my own, I wouldn't give him anything. If in my own, I'd all but drain my bank account.
5) Does it have to be true? If not I'd talk about some VD I wanted them to think I'd had for years and lecture them on the importance of always using condoms. If it had to be true I'd talk about something really random, like dolphins vs blue sofas.
6) The second one. If I did something, I'll take personal responcibility for myself, but I would never tolerate being lied about, especially if my honesty were in question.
And for the others....
7) In theory I'd say yes, but in reality I just don't think I'm strong enough (emotionally).
8) Absolutely. Especially if the person I have in mind really is my soulmate.
9) From some of the dreams I've had, I'm going to say F--K. NO.
10) I think they'd see him the same way many people see Homer Simpson. Fat, lazy, gluttenous, not very bright, but also funny, charming, and even unintentionally brilliant at times.
11) Get it medical attention then release it into the wild. What it does after that is it's own business.
12) Half frozen, half liquid. I prefer them a little melted anyway.
13) Sit down and say nothing because the horse holds the fate of all those politcal prisoners.
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Post by dannyd on Oct 3, 2007 2:43:28 GMT -5
Important Questions to ask anyone before you decide to love them. More importantly, what are your answers? 1. Let us assume you met a rudimentary magician. Let us assume he can do five simple tricks-- he can pull a rabbit out of his hat, he can make a coin disappear, he can turn the ace of spades into the Joker card, and the others in a similar vein. These are his only tricks and he can't learn any more; he can only do these five. HOWEVER, it turns out he's doing these five magic tricks with real magic. It's not an illusion; he can actually conjure the bunny out of the ether and he can move the coin through space. He's legitimately magical, but extremely limited in scope and influence. Would this person be more impressive than Albert Einstein?Depends why I am being asked! I'd choose the magician for a birthday party. But I were to have a drink and a conversation with one, I'd choose Einstein. The turtle. Rather not have attract the unsavoury sorts to my home. Rather not have a skull in my house. I think I could keep a turtle alive. Besides, when I have a house, I'll likely have a dog, if I have a dog I wouldn't want to risk it having a chew and being possessed by Hitler or something. I can't answer this question because I have no idea to what it refers! hmmmmm tough one. $4.20 because that is the price of a beer at my local, and beer makes me more attractive too. Ok let's say $25.20. or maybe $29.40. Why spend significant money on something you'll never (or shouldn't) be proud of? Banquet? I think we should make this more of a picnic.... What DO I think about... thinking about my exes...... It's going to sound like I'm only saying waht I think will not get be castigated by the girls on here, but I'm being honest. I've never had a messy break-up or ended a relationship with any nasty feelings. So to be honest, I'd only speak good things... perhaps about why each was significant and maybe what each managed to teach me, even perhaps what, I hope they took away with them. For the very small collection of one/two/five night stands... well what is there to talk about? Just .... cheers This is assuming I can't creatively weasel my way out of giving the speech of course and that I have to give something more than cracking a few bad jokes and stuttering all over the place! Because I can't see any realistic situation where they'd enforce this on me! Awkward is the word. The money! It isn't true, end of story. I'm a lover, not a stealer Besides, I wouldn't have started the rumour about the co-worker, so if anyone knows anything, she opened her mouth
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Post by JohnCoolYoungHistory on Oct 3, 2007 2:55:03 GMT -5
Man, you all are failing miserably. I wouldn't date any of you . Especially you Alex - answering questions with morequestions. The nerve. (But yes, you can tell what I've been reading lately.) So if I happen to answer with responses that matches your tastes perfectly then you would date me? *thinks real hard and strains himself* Wayward, your responses seemed so perfect that they have made me forget my own original opinions. You are a quick one! Lovely post by the way.
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Post by cheeseprata on Oct 3, 2007 3:00:51 GMT -5
1. I'd go the magician.
Sometimes I don't want everything explained. There are some things that inspire you simply because they are amazing. Live with it and be happy.
2. The turtle.
I can't think of why I would want Hitler's skull in the first place and there's enough money in the world to eventually find its way to me. But the number one overwhelming reason is that turtles are just too damn cool.
3. Marry them.
There are just too many assholes who carry on living "normal" lives
4. Give him $1
Just to say you tried it. Besides....attractive to whom? I would hope not more attractive to losers and timewasters. Sounds corny but I want someone who likes me for me (Cue "Hey Leonardo" - Blessed Union of Soulds)
[b]5. I'd talk about the importance of accepting all things in your life.[/b] All that has happened has made who you are today and if you don't learn from it, then that experience is waste, be it good or bad. Then invite everyone for more.
6. The stealing.
What I do in my private life affects me. When it's a question of how I would do things that affect others and is against my morals I get really annoyed.
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Post by waywardwolf on Oct 3, 2007 3:10:54 GMT -5
Thanks Exhale.
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Post by JohnCoolYoungHistory on Oct 3, 2007 3:29:47 GMT -5
1. The magician He'd be literally "out of this world," whereas I figure another Al has to come along SOME day! Al's contributions to weapons of mass destruction still greatly impress me though!
2. Hitler's skull I think of Hitler's skull as a copy of Mein Kampf - something that could be used for educational purposes. Plus, it's more novel than a turtle.
3. Marry her I can suffer through imperfections if she is perfect in the truly important aspects
4. All of the cash in my pockets Assuming he is a real wizard and all I need to be worried about if he is truthful or not, then I'd dish out all the cash on me, which isn't bound to be much because I'm broke and use credit!
5. The irony of us all being together at once in the same place. And then a very, very long joke. I wouldn't have the nerve to talk about anything else.
6. Sex with a co-worker I'd be upset they don't believe I have what it takes to have sex with my co-worker! J.k... the false one, because it's beer goggles verus. work ethic and moral integrity in the work place.
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