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Post by viruslabrat on Dec 6, 2007 10:10:38 GMT -5
I don't resent my woman for not wanting to get married, (although I think part of her does) but simply for choosing to sleep around when she went so far as to tell her mother she really loved me. So she apparently told her mother she loved you yet she won't tell you to your face? No one does that. If I loved someone that person would be the first to hear it from me. I'm guessing it was her mother who said that she really loved you. Have you ever given thought as to why you're only hearing it from the mother? Like maybe it's the mother who thinks you're marriage-material and not her daughter? That's she's just making it up because she'd rather have you as a son-in-law than the other guys her daughter's sleeping with? That perhaps she just wants her daughter to settle down with one guy because all this sleeping around by her daughter is an embarrassment to her as a parent? And who knows what context she was using if she did say to that she "loved you". I'll readily admit to anyone that I love my friends (most of them are guys). It doesn't mean I want to marry any of them or sleep with any of them. There are many different types of love and sadly for you it doesn't sound like she "loves" you in the way you want to be loved.
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Post by daisypukes on Dec 6, 2007 12:47:11 GMT -5
^Excellent point. It's the mother that wants you in this girl's life, not the girl.
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Post by long on Dec 6, 2007 13:11:25 GMT -5
I'll readily admit to anyone that I love my friends (most of them are guys). It doesn't mean I want to marry any of them or sleep with any of them. - You really don't want to sleep with any of them? If you did want to sleep with them would you readily admit that you loved them?
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Post by viruslabrat on Dec 6, 2007 17:18:17 GMT -5
I'll readily admit to anyone that I love my friends (most of them are guys). It doesn't mean I want to marry any of them or sleep with any of them. - You really don't want to sleep with any of them? If you did want to sleep with them would you readily admit that you loved them? It's true, I don't want to sleep with any of them. I guess it's probably because I've known them since they were just boys in high school and I've never thought of them in a sexual way. If I did want to sleep with them I would tell them that I loved them, well you'd have to get the ball rolling somehow! And if I were intimidated by someone that I've known over 12 years there'd be no hope for me Nah, I'd be more afraid to admit my feelings for a guy I don't know very well.
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Post by long on Dec 7, 2007 1:55:29 GMT -5
It's true, I don't want to sleep with any of them. I guess it's probably because I've known them since they were just boys in high school and I've never thought of them in a sexual way - You weren't having sexual thoughts about mere 'boys' in HS? A question for the men: - How significant to you is the number of sexual partners your SO has had prior to your relationship? Feel free to separate based on levels of commitment as you see fit.
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Post by daisypukes on Dec 7, 2007 2:31:32 GMT -5
What men really want is to sit in this chair: in this room:
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Post by long on Dec 7, 2007 2:34:19 GMT -5
It makes no logical sense (assuming that she's committed and doesn't cheat) but it would bug the hell out of me knowing there were a lot of guys out there who had been with her. - And you said you weren't going to be PC. I'm sure there are some guys that could make logical sense out of that attitude... I'll just say that for me it depends on the individual female, trust is the issue and can be very specific to the interaction between two individuals. A history of cheating is much more significant than promiscuity.. - And why are you so opposed to casual relationships? I can't imagine that it's a moral stance for you.
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Post by long on Dec 7, 2007 2:48:18 GMT -5
I wasn't being pc. I was merely pointing out that promiscuity and cheating aren't necessarily the same thing and so there is no logical basis for me to reject a woman on the basis of how many lovers she's had (assuming she has not been negatively affected by it i.e. disease children etc.). It's an illogical decision arising out of an emotional response based on jealousy. She's mine, and I don't want any other man to have her past, present or future - Ah, so you meant it with complete sincerity Let me ask you this then: do you not think that there is any logic in imagining that a person who has had many sexual partners would generally have a somewhat different view concerning the emotional connection between love and sex? You wouldn't think that a promiscuous person was in love with all their sex partners right? Whether or not you follow me up to this point: would it bother you if your partner was not attaching the same emotional significance to the sex act that you were?
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Post by long on Dec 7, 2007 2:49:40 GMT -5
- This is truly hypnotic. But two will do me just fine.. and like I said, face will always be the most important.
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Post by long on Dec 7, 2007 2:51:36 GMT -5
Then why do you deny any logic to judging a potential partner on past promiscuity?
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Post by long on Dec 7, 2007 3:00:04 GMT -5
Now you're thinking like a robot. - It's logical to base decisions on emotional judgment. It's certainly logical to include your emotions in considerations of this sort. I'd even say ultimately all 'rational' choices have emotional content at their foundation- recognize this argument?
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Post by long on Dec 7, 2007 3:07:08 GMT -5
The flawed human is the one that doesn't consult his emotions in making decisions... but let's take this back to our little morality corner (where you owe me a post!).
Back to the question for the men : - How significant to you is the number of sexual partners your SO has had prior to your relationship? Feel free to separate based on levels of commitment as you see fit.
-Zoff's answer: significant
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Post by ~bep_pu~ on Dec 7, 2007 7:29:10 GMT -5
Sex, for sex's sake just demeans the experience (i.m.h.o.). nah.
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Post by viruslabrat on Dec 7, 2007 9:39:52 GMT -5
It's true, I don't want to sleep with any of them. I guess it's probably because I've known them since they were just boys in high school and I've never thought of them in a sexual way - You weren't having sexual thoughts about mere 'boys' in HS? Not THESE boys! Ha ha! ;D
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chad
Full Member
Life is not short, it's actually bloody long!
Posts: 383
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Post by chad on Dec 10, 2007 5:49:17 GMT -5
Ah this forum cracks me up!
Surely Jewbird can't be real?
Elle as smart as ever.
It's all good.
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