Being alienated from the Chinese

[Miyuki]

Jul 11, 2008 7:35:11 GMT -5 @pandaroo said:

Honest, I have been extremely patient with every attempt to belong with the Chinese... doesn't matter though, it never works and I'm always left feeling lost and alone. I try not to make it obvious that I'm trying too hard or what not, but have encountered a lot of discrimination and false assumptions that are always made about me. It's all prejudgemental. I could tell you a lot more stories... but they're absolutely filled with anger now that I realize what rubbish I've put up with all these years.

I've given up on them altogether. I wish I could somehow "divorce" the oriental gene from my DNA.

Do you know any half-Chinese ppl in real life? Siblings? Do they feel the same way?

[jericho]

At the end of the day we're all gonna be chinese. f*** I'm already 1/8th of the way there.

If you aren't Chinese you will be sooner or later.

[st0831]

I just registered here after I happen to hop on to this site and found this post. I find this article and the respondents somewhat hateful IN MY OPINION.

Let me give you a little background of myself. I myself am a of Chinese descent born in a traditional village of Hong Kong. By traditional, I have an ancestral hall with 25+ generations of deceased ancestors' name plates sitting in the back hall, in addition, where my plate will be placed on if I died. I came to the US when I was three years old. Granted I came when I was three years old and was raised in NYC for 18 years but I have never discriminated against any Eurasians who were of mixed blood just because I know that I can trace back my ancestry to the Song Dynasty. I am sorry that you have had negative experiences but life, in general, is all yourself that matters. Accept yourself then accept others. If you're seeking a ethnic group, Chinese or white or whatever, to accept you so you can identify yourself, I would have to say your approach is wrong.

I actually want to meet Eurasians especially of Chinese/Anglo descent because I know they are an offspring of two accepting parents. I want to see how they are and what they identify themselves as. In the end of the conversation I will offer advice if they are confused. But once again I have never ever met one. Its quite ironic because living in NYC gives you access to all cultures and peoples of the world. I find Eurasians very attractive not only because of their physical appearances but also the amazing humanity that lies behind them (once again two culturally different parents). No culture is superior to another regardless. Just because I can trace back my fathers to the Song Dynasty doesn't mean it is superior to American or European Culture. If you start looking at the world as if it was once race, a lot of times you let go of the stupid stereotypes and all that. Of course this philosophy is difficult to enforce but it all starts by enforcing it with yourself.

Whether in other's peoples minds I am pure Chinese or FOB immigrant, I simply don't care because I live for myself not for their stereotypical opinions. If you want others to accept you, you first prove to others that you are capable of being a human not a ethnicity. I'll tell you a funny story how ignorant people are. I went to Hong Kong Summer of 2007 ( as I do go back to Hong Kong/China mostly every summer) and signed up for a tour to go to Hang Zhou and Suzhou, China. My tour guide was obviously "Hangzhounese" so we talked and talked until he found that I immigrated to the US. So he started looking at my face and thought to himself. "My, my you're starting to look white" which implies that I am losing my Chinese face, LOL. I was not offended because I understand geographical differences. I look Chinese, my face is Chinese, and my blood is Chinese, BUT the ignorance lies within his lack of understanding. Chinese people usually can tell themselves apart geographically. Southern Chinese look different from Northern Chinese, Western Chinese, etc. In general people just look different. His method of calling me a Chinese losing my heritage is offensive but I do not take it seriously because I for sure know that it stems from ignorance.

I no longer look at myself as a pure blood anymore simply because it originates from social propaganda and politics. If race was such an important thing then we should trace back our race to Africa, the human race. Everyone originated there according to scientists. Why do we have race definitions? I tell you its all about brainwashing. I wouldn't say I lost my Chinese heritage just because I don't burn incense and sweep my ancestor's graves. Respect comes from the heart not from actions that you do superficially to please others (e.g. keeping a nice clean grave so it doesn't look like a burial mound). There is no pure race. If race is included in equations of life then you will realize it creates a social class, ethnic class, constraints. Being of a certain race does not deny or grant you of anything unless you let it be. You must be proving to others that you are capable of doing what every healthy human being on this earth can do and break the chains and cuffs of racism.

Don't get lost in the race game because it only generates more hate within you. "I am not accepted as Chinese so I am going to associate with whites more. Chinese bitches..." See the hate? With this type of attitude I will ignore you even if you're Chinese or not.

[cm]

Jul 13, 2008 12:43:00 GMT -5 st0831 said:

I just registered here after I happen to hop on to this site and found this post. I find this article and the respondents somewhat hateful IN MY OPINION.

Let me give you a little background of myself. I myself am a of Chinese descent born in a traditional village of Hong Kong. By traditional, I have an ancestral hall with 25+ generations of deceased ancestors' name plates sitting in the back hall, in addition, where my plate will be placed on if I died. I came to the US when I was three years old. Granted I came when I was three years old and was raised in NYC for 18 years but I have never discriminated against any Eurasians who were of mixed blood just because I know that I can trace back my ancestry to the Song Dynasty. I am sorry that you have had negative experiences but life, in general, is all yourself that matters. Accept yourself then accept others. If you're seeking a ethnic group, Chinese or white or whatever, to accept you so you can identify yourself, I would have to say your approach is wrong.

I actually want to meet Eurasians especially of Chinese/Anglo descent because I know they are an offspring of two accepting parents. I want to see how they are and what they identify themselves as. In the end of the conversation I will offer advice if they are confused. But once again I have never ever met one. Its quite ironic because living in NYC gives you access to all cultures and peoples of the world. I find Eurasians very attractive not only because of their physical appearances but also the amazing humanity that lies behind them (once again two culturally different parents). No culture is superior to another regardless. Just because I can trace back my fathers to the Song Dynasty doesn't mean it is superior to American or European Culture. If you start looking at the world as if it was once race, a lot of times you let go of the stupid stereotypes and all that. Of course this philosophy is difficult to enforce but it all starts by enforcing it with yourself.

Whether in other's peoples minds I am pure Chinese or FOB immigrant, I simply don't care because I live for myself not for their stereotypical opinions. If you want others to accept you, you first prove to others that you are capable of being a human not a ethnicity. I'll tell you a funny story how ignorant people are. I went to Hong Kong Summer of 2007 ( as I do go back to Hong Kong/China mostly every summer) and signed up for a tour to go to Hang Zhou and Suzhou, China. My tour guide was obviously "Hangzhounese" so we talked and talked until he found that I immigrated to the US. So he started looking at my face and thought to himself. "My, my you're starting to look white" which implies that I am losing my Chinese face, LOL. I was not offended because I understand geographical differences. I look Chinese, my face is Chinese, and my blood is Chinese, BUT the ignorance lies within his lack of understanding. Chinese people usually can tell themselves apart geographically. Southern Chinese look different from Northern Chinese, Western Chinese, etc. In general people just look different. His method of calling me a Chinese losing my heritage is offensive but I do not take it seriously because I for sure know that it stems from ignorance.

I no longer look at myself as a pure blood anymore simply because it originates from social propaganda and politics. If race was such an important thing then we should trace back our race to Africa, the human race. Everyone originated there according to scientists. Why do we have race definitions? I tell you its all about brainwashing. I wouldn't say I lost my Chinese heritage just because I don't burn incense and sweep my ancestor's graves. Respect comes from the heart not from actions that you do superficially to please others (e.g. keeping a nice clean grave so it doesn't look like a burial mound). There is no pure race. If race is included in equations of life then you will realize it creates a social class, ethnic class, constraints. Being of a certain race does not deny or grant you of anything unless you let it be. You must be proving to others that you are capable of doing what every healthy human being on this earth can do and break the chains and cuffs of racism.

Don't get lost in the race game because it only generates more hate within you. "I am not accepted as Chinese so I am going to associate with whites more. Chinese bitches..." See the hate? With this type of attitude I will ignore you even if you're Chinese or not.

She's just a teenager going through a phase. Though it is unfortunate that half the people on the site do share the same feelings with her, I have to commend her for at least admitting it, and not pretending to be PC about it.

Regardless, I generally agree with you. Race is a concept created by Monarchs, Dictators and Capitalist overlords to turn the common people against one another, while they continue their exploititive practices.

You can see this being done by the CCP today. They sometimes put out anti-Japanese propaganda to rile the people up and put a scapegoat for their problems...even though the problems stem from the CCP catering to capitalists.

In Nazi Germany, Hitler used racism to unite the German people, placing all problems Germany had on Jews and Gypsies.

Race is used to divide us. We are naturally racist most probably due to evolutionary baggage. It was advantageous for your body to emit stereotypes for back then, tribes were competing for limited resources.

But as the age of biotechnology and science has arrived the past century or two, these fears are becoming irrelavent. Cultural differences are disappearing as McDonald's and MTV is being introduces to different nations.

IMO, there's nothing wrong with being prejudice. It's natural. But for humans to advance as a society, we should actively look to look past these feelings. For if we do not, we are no better than chimpanzees throwing bananas at one another.

[pandaroo]

^ Ok, thanks for your insight. Yes, I went through phases when I hated being EA (well, I still do). The point is: just how does one belong? What must one do? I mean, I once considered having plastic surgery just to try to belong, but I'll admit that was taking things to the extreme.

Look, I just want to get 'initated' into the group. The culture. Any way in, just as long as they accept me. God, even my school is divided. There's groups everywhere, all based on culture and colour. Please just tell me what to do? I don't wanna be a loner.

[teek]

Pandaroo, you're good looking, so I think you're gonna be ok, you'll find your niche somewhere...

[cm]

Jul 14, 2008 2:29:34 GMT -5 @pandaroo said:

^ Ok, thanks for your insight. Yes, I went through phases when I hated being EA (well, I still do). The point is: just how does one belong? What must one do? I mean, I once considered having plastic surgery just to try to belong, but I'll admit that was taking things to the extreme.

Look, I just want to get 'initated' into the group. The culture. Any way in, just as long as they accept me. God, even my school is divided. There's groups everywhere, all based on culture and colour. Please just tell me what to do? I don't wanna be a loner.

Don't look to make friends of a certain race. Look to make friends in general and whatever race they are let it be.

[Altan]

Pandaroo you are EA..(at least I think).
There are many Eurasian races out there that think as you and newbie EA's like us here at EANation. I'm pretty lucky being Japanese/German. I have the Indo-European and Ural-Altaic races of heritage that have been fighting on the Eurasian continent for thousands of years and have mixed many times over. Basically I'm in the Turanian camp and some other camps. But I have know doubt my position.

It's the Old East/West supremacy that has been goiong on for many thousands of years. Ural-Altaic people and Indo-European tribes have been fighting for territory and minds for such a long time. Both are mighty peoples based on skill of the fight.

This fight between Occidental and Oriental has been going on longer than you think.
Way before the Mongol Ordu!
Being Indo-European and Ural-Altaic is beautiful!

[turboman]

^ EA pride, it touches my heart . That's a positive winning attitude brother, you're a shining example for us all

[alphamikefoxtrot]

Jul 15, 2008 1:11:53 GMT -5 cm said:

Don't look to make friends of a certain race. Look to make friends in general and whatever race they are let it be.

This is good advice.

[Miyuki]

Jul 15, 2008 12:58:19 GMT -5 @alphamikefoxtrot said:

Jul 15, 2008 1:11:53 GMT -5 cm said:

Don't look to make friends of a certain race. Look to make friends in general and whatever race they are let it be.

This is good advice.

Agreed!

[pandaroo]

^I see. Guess all of you are truly right about accepting people regardless of race.

Trouble is, I'm missing out on belonging to my Chinese half... that's another problem I face. Yes, it is better to befriend those who are willing to accept you no matter what your race, but, how do I NOT be excluded from the Chinese? What I mean is that each time I try to get closer to their culture they don't even acknowledge me as one of them.

What I really mean to ask you guys here on EAN is.....

1. Just WHAT does an EA have to do to gain acceptance into the hearts of their asian side?
2. HOW does an EA belong or fit in with the culture that they are supposedly 1/2 of?
3. Oh yeah, and if any of you EAs out there have ever done crazy sh*t just to belong (like I have), I mean have you ever tried dying your hair darker, etc? Yeah, I did that once.

Pure people seem to have no problem belonging and fitting in with the culture they were born to, hell, generally they're even recognized instantly by their own people!

Is it that EAs don't actually deserve to belong to either half of their cultures? And purebreds automatically do

Ostracization is my problem!

[halfbreed]

They can probably smell your fear... or in this case... extreme need to fit in with them?

[alphamikefoxtrot]

Strive has a good point.

Besides, if these are ABC's (Australian Born Chinese) AND they are teenagers, too, maybe they themselves are a little too into the whole culture thing as well. That they are forming cliques based on appearance and perceived heritage.

Don't know what else to tell you except to stop wanting it so much. Whether or not someone deserves something rarely weighs in on the outcome.

And in case all this reads as "blah blah blah somethingsomeoldfartsaid" then here's a short answer:

Learn Mandarin or Cantonese.

[quiapo]

Hi Pandaroo - I am sorry you have had such difficulty being accepted. Perhaps you have been looking in the wrong places. I am only a small part Chinese, and I have previously lived in Sydney where I developed good friendships with Australian Born Chinese, who dont speak any Chinese themselves. When I moved away, a Chinese Association was being set up locally, and I was invited to be among the founding members. Like you I am fascinated by my Chinese heritage and find much to admire in the culture. I eventually left the Association because of demands on my professional life, but I still share warm friendships with some of the community.
Perhaps it might be best not to try to integrate, but relate to people on an individual basis - just one human being to another, and see what follows.